JANA HOCKING: Married men need to get out of my way – here’s how they manage to chase away single blokes every time

Hey married guys, stop getting in our way! Seriously, it drives us single ladies crazy.

On Thursday, my friend and I were cornered in the bar by a couple of old, thirsty, married men – apparently looking to get their egos stroked by two beautiful young women before heading home to their wives. The problem – the fun was all theirs.

My friends and I had gone to the pub after paying our respects to the Anzacs, with the intention of playing as a couple and tossing the coin on finding some hot single men to flirt with.

Annoyingly, the queues to get into the pubs around Paddington were huge, so one by one the girls stopped in search of something better. With one friend left standing, we finally walked into the crowded bar and realized we were being crammed in like sardines. Luckily a group of guys our age showed up not far behind us and they looked great!

We started looking at each other and it started well.

Jana was recently in a pub for Anzac Day when two married men ambushed her and a friend

There were men shouting ‘heads’ and ‘tails’ at each other in a macho caveman way, like a good giggle way, we were elated… there was one tall, handsome one in particular, and we had a good old flirt party. Until…

I walked up to the heavily loaded bar to buy a drink for my friend and me. I finally got to the front of the line and felt a tap on my shoulder. Two older men with wedding rings tried to get my attention. They asked if I could order their drinks too so they wouldn’t have to wait in line – and in return they would pay for my drinks. Certainly! I thought it was a great exchange of services.

So I ordered four drinks, took two and said thank you before going back to my friend.

What I didn’t realize was that they were following me. Sigh.

By the time I’d pushed myself back against the wall of the crowded pub and gotten my friend a drink, I noticed they were trying to join us and there was nowhere to go. They talked to us for what felt like an hour. Not with us. With us. And because the bar was so packed, we couldn’t really escape it. What I thought was an act of kindness turned into a hijacking.

As we nodded politely and gave very short answers, they dominated the conversation and clearly loved having two younger women there to make them feel alive. The problem was that their joy was not ours.

The guys we were watching assumed we were now happily entertaining these older (married) guys and turned their attention elsewhere. Shit.

Jana has tried to politely decline their advances and give short answers, but the men persist

Finally my friend said she had to go to the toilet and left to go chat with the younger and very single guys and asked them to save us.

Which luckily they did, and we had a great afternoon rightfully flirting with men our own age who weren’t thirsty old guys who weren’t necessarily looking to cheat, but wanted to boost their egos by talking to women who were half their age.

And that would be something to laugh/cringe if this was the first time this happened. But that is not it.

Why is it that married men seem to have the most confidence in a bar? Is it because the outcome doesn’t really matter?

They already have wives at home, so they can hang around like ridiculous peacocks, and if someone takes the bait, fine. If that is not the case, they sleep comfortably next to their other half.

Is it because they really want to feel young and free again? To convince themselves that they are still attractive to the opposite sex?

Jana wondered why married men feel so comfortable flirting with single women in bars

On another previous outing, I was at a CBD bar with two girlfriends for after-work drinks when an obviously drunk man came to the table. He had a huge Rolex watch that was hard to miss, and a shiny gold wedding ring.

He told us he was coming from a long lunch and asked if we could join him and his mates at a table on the other side of the bar. One look in that direction and it was clear that they were all married men who had just enjoyed a drunken boys’ lunch.

We politely thanked him for the invitation and said we would do that later. Code words for: absolutely not.

He spent the next hour making hot rounds around our table, each time insisting that we join his group. We finally left.

Gentlemen, I understand that you are probably going through a midlife crisis, but can you solve this? Because every time you try to take up space among us single men, you’re filling up a space that should be filled by single men. And it’s really starting to get annoying.

So choose therapy, or for your wives, or for your mistresses. And let us singles lock eyes with other singles in bars. Serious.