Jackie O. Henderson opens up about the type of men she used to fall for — and the way her exes “mistreated” her in relationships.
The 49-year-old radio presenter said she has been “treated so badly” by her romantic partners in the past in the first episode of her new Her best life podcastwhich she presents together with her manager Gemma O’Neill.
“I have absolutely not valued myself in the past and I have been treated so poorly with what I have accepted,” Jackie admitted.
“I’ve always been a real people pleaser. In every relationship I’ve had, I’ve been the nurturer, the giver.”
Jackie O first announced her split from her ex-husband Lee Henderson, to whom she was married for 15 years, in 2018.
The radio star was married to her former radio colleague Phil O’Neil for four years before they divorced in 1999.
“I’m no angel,” she continued in the podcast, which reached number one on Apple Podcasts overnight.
“I’m certainly not saying I was Mother Teresa. I definitely had my flaws in relationships, but I definitely was more concerned with how everyone else in my life felt, and I always put myself last.”
Jackie O Henderson revealed how she learned to set boundaries in romantic relationships and overcame her people-pleasing tendencies to avoid being ‘treated badly’
The 49-year-old radio star admitted that she previously wasn’t even able to tell her ex-boyfriends if she didn’t like the way they spoke to her
Jackie says she never had the confidence to stand up for herself in relationships, even when there were small issues, like telling her ex-boyfriends that she didn’t like the way they spoke to her.
“If it would make them uncomfortable, or if the situation would become uncomfortable, I just wouldn’t do it,” she said.
It was more important that they [felt comfortable]than me. I’d rather be the one suffering and biting my tongue. Because I didn’t want them to feel bad.’
The mother of one also spoke candidly about her sex and love life after the divorce and the one piece of advice her psychologist gave her that changed everything.
“Self-love often comes from putting yourself first, setting boundaries, and being comfortable saying, ‘Hey, I have a problem with that, can we talk about it?’” Jackie says.
I’ve been terrible at [boundaries] my whole life.’
Jackie O first announced her split from ex-husband Lee Henderson, pictured, in 2018. The couple had been together for more than 18 years and share a now 13-year-old daughter Kitty
Gemma and Jackie, best friends and business partners, share a psychologist. He instructed the radio host to start by setting a small boundary that felt comfortable and ‘achievable’.
“The feeling you get afterwards is actually quite encouraging,” Jackie said.
“What happens is you get addicted to how that feels… You get a smile on your face because you’re taking care of yourself. And you know what? You think, ‘I solved a situation and it was all very positive.’
‘Then the next time you do a bigger one, and one that feels really uncomfortable after that. The more you do it, the more you feel empowered, and the more you’ll do it.
Jackie explained that these small actions had a snowball effect until she began attracting “higher value people, moments, and situations” into her life.
“It doesn’t have to be a profound moment or an epiphany, but you start with something small and work your way up,” she said.
‘People treat you bad and you get abused in certain situations and you just have to accept it in life. Sitting there and thinking, well f**k, this is the situation I’m in and I’m going to continue with it.
“When you choose yourself and love yourself more, you will attract people and situations into your life that match the love you give yourself – there is no doubt about that.”
After her divorce, Jackie used dating apps for about three days, claiming she had already met “the one.”
Jackie O revealed that her biggest fear when dating now is going on a blind date or a date through a dating app and not liking the guy
I remember your first date [after her divorce]’, Gemma told her about the nameless man.
“You were so excited and you couldn’t wait to meet him. I think you had built up in your head that this was it.”
The radio host’s best friend said that over the years, Jackie has “definitely developed a pattern” when it comes to the type of men she’s attracted to.
“I imagined our life together, I dreamed about our wedding, I knew he was the one, without ever meeting him,” Jackie recalls with a laugh.
“I was excited and you weren’t.”
It would be the first of many first dates that Jackie said sometimes left her feeling “so exhausted” at the end of the evening.
“Sometimes I felt like I was interviewing them,” she said of her dating app experiences. “I was trying so hard to be engaging and upbeat and it was just ridiculous to be honest. That’s not me.”
‘I worked my ass off, I was so exhausted by the time I got home from one of those dates.’
The radio personality has grown into a full-fledged socialite in recent years.
Jackie’s group of friends previously included co-host Kyle, KIIS newsreader Brooklyn Ross and Gemma.
The blonde beauty now mixes with the rich and famous of Australia, even traveling to Europe for the wedding of one of her new friends in July.
Thanks to her close relationship with PE Nation designer Pip Edwards, Jackie also moves in the same circles as Sydney’s top stylist Jess Pecoraro, celebrity make-up artist Max May and Four Seasons condom heirs Michael and Alexander Porter.