An orgasm is an orgasm, right? It feels the same for everyone.
Turns out that assumption is wrong: Orgasms vary from person to person.
It’s a bit like playing Pictionary. One person’s idea of a horse is completely different from another’s. Still, both of you are surprised that you don’t draw and imagine it the same way.
A recent study by neuroscience professor Dr. James Pfaus of Charles University in Prague identified three types of orgasms: the wave, avalanche, and volcano.
He asked 54 women to use a vibrator that senses the strength of the pelvic floor contractions and brings themselves to orgasm over several days. The vibrator – a biofeedback tool for the pelvic floor – was aptly named the Lioness.
A recent study by neuroscience professor Dr. James Pfaus of Charles University in Prague identified three types of orgasms: the wave, avalanche, and volcano. stock image used
Little research has been done on how women experience orgasm, but what little that has been done suggests that we are more individual than we are alike.
It could be that we are genetically programmed to only experience orgasm in a certain way.
But if, like me, you’re intrigued to expand your repertoire, here are some tips that might steer you down a road less traveled.
RIDE ‘THE WAVE’
Nearly 50 percent of the women in the study had this kind of orgasm: a series of successive contractions or undulations where the tension was released as they came.
How to get one:
The key to experiencing the most common type of orgasm probably lies in focusing on the two factors that most predict orgasm will occur: repetition and rhythm.
While it’s great to experiment with different techniques during the excitement stage, it’s critical to keep doing whatever you’re doing the closer you get to the finish line. Change techniques when you’re minutes or seconds away and chances are you’ll miss the orgasm entirely. Dive to the bottom of the arousal scale instead of shooting to the top.
British sex expert Tracey Cox (pictured) shares her top tips on how to achieve the different types of orgasms
If you want to impress a woman, you can’t do it by showing how many techniques you have mastered. It’s knowing when to stay with the one she enjoys.
Mix things up:
Try a new technique for at least two minutes. It takes a while for our body to react and decide whether it likes something or not. Stimulation that starts out as irritating can turn into intense pleasure with repetition.
Switch up your style by forcing yourself to change your preferred method. If you prefer a slow burn and like soft and slow things, occasionally switch to firmer, faster stimulation for a minute or two, then slow it down again. (Just be sure to do this early in the arousal phase, rather than approaching orgasm.)
If you’re up for a drastic change in intensity, try the opposite style of stimulation you’re used to, and keep it up the whole time.
EXPERIENCE ‘THE AVALANCE’
This orgasm begins with the highest pre-orgasm tension, which then decreases once you climax.
Seventeen percent of the women experienced an avalanche orgasm.
How to get one:
One way to influence your orgasm style is to change how directly you stimulate the clitoris – and which part you stimulate.
A little anatomy lesson to explain: the part of the clitoris you can see is just the tip: the glans. It is the area with the most nerve endings and extremely sensitive to touch. The body of the clitoris is hidden. There are two ‘legs’ that split in two to form bulbs that extend down the sides of the labia. These bulbs also contain erectile tissue that swells with blood during sexual arousal to increase lubrication and sensation.
You need a stronger, firmer pressure to stimulate the parts of the clitoris that are hidden under the skin because there is an extra layer on top.
Some women prefer to reach orgasm through direct stimulation of the tip of the clitoris; others climax through indirect stimulation of the “inner” body. Turn it on and you’ll probably experience orgasm in a different way.
Vary the sensation:
If you’re used to direct stimulation…
Turn the intensity knob down by avoiding direct stroking of the head. Instead, place your hand around the entire vulva and move it up and down and side to side. (You use the lips or “labia” as a friction tool.) Also try rubbing against a pillow or the side of the couch or lying on your stomach to add pressure while using the cupping technique.
Instead of using a finger or sex toy, focus on the softer simulation of a tongue through oral sex. Or try anterior wall stimulation (the part under your abdomen) by choosing a position that allows his penis to stimulate the home of the “G-spot.”
If you’re used to indirect stimulation…
Go back to an old favorite: circling the clitoris with a finger is still the best technique for a reason. It’s effective.
Use the pad of your finger to move the clitoral hood (the fold of skin that protects the clitoris) in a circular motion around the clitoris. Use plenty of lube and keep the pressure light and the circle ‘big’ at first.
Then increase the pressure and make the circle smaller and more focused on the glans as the arousal increases.
The tip you’ve heard before – to spell the letters of the alphabet with your finger or tongue – is still doing the rounds because it’s a good way to make sure you reach all parts of the clitoris. Not only does this help stop the sensitization, it also helps you discover which part of your clitoris enjoys a certain kind of touch the most.
Whatever might lead you to this type…
MAKE A ‘VOLCAN’
As the name suggests, this orgasm is more explosive. It starts with lower tension in the pelvic floor, which then suddenly builds up and releases at the point of orgasm.
It is the least common form: only eleven percent of women experience it.
How to get one:
Another deciding factor in the kind of orgasm you experience is your unique biological makeup.
All clitoris are different because there are no fixed number of nerve endings in the clitoris. Recent research shows that the number of nerve endings varies from ten to eleven thousand (more than the eight thousand mentioned earlier), but we are all individual in how many we get and where they end up.
Therefore, there is no one ‘best way’ to stimulate the clitoris. It all depends on where your nerve endings are concentrated individually. They may be closest to the top or bottom of the glans, others have more weight on one side or the other
This is why the most gentle touch in a certain place is too much for one woman, but perfect for another.
Find your best side:
These techniques help establish the intensity. But don’t be surprised if you notice your ‘bull’s eye’ changes. Stress, your menstrual cycle, how excited you are – it all affects the intensity your body craves.
Use the clock technique. It’s a simple, foolproof way to find out (and guide your partner) to the areas that are most and least sensitive to you.
Imagine a dial that surrounds your vulva. The clitoris, at the top (closest to your abdomen), is 12 o’clock and the opening to the vagina (at the bottom) is 6 o’clock. If something feels right half way through, it’s at three o’clock or nine o’clock (etc.).
Experiment solo, using a vibrator or your fingers, and make a mental note of which area feels best for you, at different levels of arousal. Or let your partner do the work while you report back.
The clock technique is especially useful during oral sex. Much easier to say, ‘Go back to four o’clock!’; then do the whole “a little up, a little down” thing if they deviate from your personal pleasure zone.
Use the Kivin method. This is basically oral sex performed sideways, so it focuses on one side of the clitoris. Instead of lying between your legs, your partner lies perpendicular so that your body forms a T shape.
Not only does the tongue point directly at one side, it also moves sideways instead of up and down.
Another way to change your orgasm style is by using sex toys. You can find Tracey’s range of products – Tracey Cox Supersex (for couples) and Tracey Cox Edge (for men) – at lovehoney.co.uk.