Influencer who is 37-years-younger than her wife reveals why they decided to have an open marriage – and insist they remain a ‘team’

An influencer with a wife 37 years her senior has revealed the couple have 'opened' their marriage – after realizing they are in 'very different places' in their lives.

Julia Zelg, 29, and Eileen de Freest, 66, made headlines after meeting on Tinder and getting married in 2019.

Despite being together for almost four decades and facing backlash from trolls criticizing their love, the London-based couple insist they remain 'a team'.

But after struggling with 'marriage problems' during lockdown, the couple have decided to open up their marriage and are both 'casually' dating other people.

With rules aimed at being 'very honest' with each other at all times, the couple can even meet each other's new love interests.

'We are 1701530881 ethically non-monogamous, which has allowed us both to explore other connections while getting back together,” said Julia, a YouTuber and singer.

'We learn more about ourselves and each other.

'I'm exploring my sexuality, and Eileen is finding that at this stage of her life she's more interested in intellectual connection than physical connection – although that's certainly still part of it.

'We both have informal relationships with people and are open and honest with each other about those other relationships.

“It's been a lot of fun connecting through crushes, dates and more, and it has brought a new energy and lightness to our connection.”

In the video, Julia says, “She [Eileen] is now 66, she has the right to retire, she doesn't have to live at the same pace as me.

“Because of the age difference, we are at very different stages in our lives.”

They announced the news this week on YouTube, where Julia has 300,000 subscribers, and on social media – where viewers wondered if it “destroyed the whole point of marriage.”

In the video, the duo shared how their newly opened relationship works – with rules and boundaries to ensure both parties are happy.

For Julia and Eileen, they explained that the most important thing was that they were 'very honest', both with each other and with the people they met with.

Julia said: 'If we ever feel uncomfortable about something, we tell each other and make changes – we always put our love and our marriage first.'

The couple said they asked each other questions about new partners, and even introduced each other on dates.

In the video, they confirmed that they are “both casually dating other people.”

Eileen said: 'One of the things that has been difficult for me over the four and a half years of our marriage is that my hormones have been quite messed up.

“I just haven't had much desire… and that's been a problem between us.

“For me, I was just looking more for intellectual connections.

'I have a wonderful intellectual bond with you [Julia]but when looking for other people it was a bit complicated because I had to say, 'I just like to cuddle!'

For Julia, the focus was more on 'discovering' her sexuality, which is more 'fluid' than she had previously thought, because she had always identified as a lesbian.

The women also explained that they were dating separately – because they had “such different tastes” – and that opening the marriage was not a way to look for a third member.

Julia said, “Sometimes we're not attracted to the same people, or the people we're attracted to aren't attracted to both of us.

“We are so different and we have different types.”

The idea of ​​an open marriage initially emerged during the lockdown.

Julia said: “During the pandemic, like almost everyone, we faced many challenges.

“We were living in a small space and dealing with significant Covid stress, while I was also finishing graduate school and working full-time.

'Meanwhile, Eileen had retired and was at high risk of Covid complications.

'This caused a lot of tension in our relationship.

'I think for the first time it really became clear that although we are deeply in love and share values ​​and interests, we are in very different places in our lives.

“Things were reaching a breaking point, so we decided to take some space with me when I traveled more to the US for work.

“That was very helpful because we could miss each other and come back together with joy and excitement.”

Now they say the opening of their marriage has been 'very positive' and has 'brought more lightness and understanding' into the relationship.

Julia added, “One thing has become abundantly clear: we are family.

“We are a team and we love each other very much, and although our relationship may change in different ways when we are together, we will always be family.”