Influencer shares SIX ‘psychological’ signs ‘someone secretly dislikes you’ – but is he right?

Have you ever had a sneaking feeling that someone secretly doesn’t like you, but you have no proof of it?

An influencer who makes videos about mindset and psychology has created a series that claims to reveal the signs someone isn’t your biggest fan.

Josh Fraser Young from Christchurch, New Zealand, has one number of videos which outlines how to identify “the secret haters” around you.

He has over 500,000 views on TikToks and has mastered 193,000 followers @joshfraseryoung.

The influencer warned: ‘Knowing these will open your eyes to what people really think about you, so be warned’ – read on for the full list and what a certified psychologist thinks of the claims.

They downplay your achievements

The TikToker said the most important thing to look out for is when someone downplays your achievements.

He used the example of a friend telling you, “Running a mile in seven minutes isn’t very good. I know someone who can run one in six minutes.”

Josh explained, “People who dislike you are easily prone to jealousy, especially if you’re doing better than them.

“So know that if someone around you shows signs of jealousy, deep down he or she actually wants you to fail.”

Psychology consultant and life coach Bayu Prihandito gave his opinion on the tips.

He said: ‘It’s true that jealousy can lead people to downplay your achievements.

‘However, this behavior often stems from their own insecurities and not from a direct dislike of the person.

“Think of it as a defense mechanism, where downplaying your success helps them cope with their feelings of inadequacy.”

Josh Fraser Young from Christchurch, New Zealand has shared a series of videos explaining how to identify and confront ‘the secret haters’ around you

They are never the first to reach out

Then they’re “never the first to reach out” and you’ll always find yourself messaging them without getting much in return, Josh claimed.

He advised, “The truth is, if someone wants to contact you, they will.

“People are on their phones 24/7, so if they never contact you or never bother to reply, chances are they don’t really like you.”

Founder at Life architecture, Prihtandito adds, “This point is quite simplistic. While it’s true that people who like you often contact you, it doesn’t always mean they don’t like you.

“Modern life means juggling multiple responsibilities and as our attention spans shrink by the day due to things like TikTok, this can lead to unintentional neglect of other aspects of our lives.

“In that case, don’t jump to conclusions, but instead consider the broader context of your relationship and the way you communicate.”

They are nice to everyone except you

The next one may seem obvious, but it could be more subtle than you think.

It’s that “they seem kind of nice to everyone else, but not to you” – whether that’s complimenting others and never complimenting you, or inviting others to events and excluding you.

Josh gave an example of someone saying, “What are you even wearing, bro?” I wish you could be as stylish as Ben.

He added: ‘You have to face the facts honestly: the way people treat you is the way they think of you.

“If someone stands up for others but refuses to show up for you in the same way, he or she doesn’t like you.”

The certified psychologist explains: ‘This behavior is a clear indicator of negative feelings, but it is not always outright disgust.

‘It can also stem from unresolved conflicts, jealousy or even personal issues that have nothing to do with you at all.

“The key is to understand the underlying reasons why you are being treated differently.”

They try to outdo you

The TikToker claims that another telltale sign is that they are always trying to outdo you and turn everything into a competition.

Josh said, “You got an A on the psychology test, I actually got an A+.”

‘People who dislike you are often jealous of you because they can’t stand it when you do better than them.

“So if someone around you shows signs of envy and tries to compete with you, know that he/she is a secret enemy in disguise.”

Prihtandito adds, “In many cases, this behavior is about the person’s issues with low self-esteem and their need to validate themselves.

‘Although it can be frustrating, understanding this can help develop empathy and tackle the cause.’

Psychology consultant and life coach Bayu Prihandito gave his opinion on the influencer’s tips

They are quick to point out your shortcomings

Likewise, Josh says they are quick to point out your shortcomings or insecurities.

For example, saying your hair looks greasy and asking if you’ve showered, especially in front of a group.

He said, “People who hate you can’t stand the spotlight on you, so they do this to put you down in front of others.”

Again, the psychologist points out that this is often a ‘reflection’ of a person’s own insecurities.

Prihtandito explained, “When a person is uncomfortable with his own shortcomings, he may project these feelings onto others. It’s less about not liking you and more about their internal struggle.”

They often misinterpret you

Finally, they will often misinterpret what you say and twist positivity into negativity.

Josh gave the example of complimenting their outfit, they might respond with something like, “What do you mean, nice outfit?” I wear this every day’.

He adds, “Because people who dislike you have a negative perception of you, they will often interpret what you say negatively, so if they take your praise as a subtle insult or a put-down, know that they have a secret be an enemy.’

Prihtandito comments on the claims, explaining: “Consistently negative interpretation of your words may be a sign of underlying resentment or personal bias.

‘However, it is also important to think about your own communication style and the words used that may contribute to these misunderstandings.’

One shocked commenter wrote: “You’re saying I need new friends,” while another wrote: “Yes this is my husband of 20 years.”

Others chimed in with: “Unfortunately my two sisters” and “Those are all my colleagues.”

Another said: ‘Unfortunately this was my last relationship!’, to which Josh replied: ‘I’m sorry to hear that. Always remember that it says more about them than it does about you.”