An American mother has opened up about raising her children in Japan and claims she was seen as a ‘bad mother’ for embracing American customs.
Suzanne Kamata, who grew up in Michigan, said she only plans to live in Japan for a year. However, the author eventually met a Japanese man at the school where she taught, whom she married and had twins with.
In an essay for Insider, the young adult author reflected on raising her children — who are half-Japanese, half-American — in Tokushima Prefecture, Japan, while still trying to incorporate some of the American customs she grew up with.
“I wanted them to grow up bilingual with an awareness of American culture,” Suzanne explained. “Living in a conservative corner of Japan, they might not feel like they fit in, but I wanted them to be proud of their origins.”
Michigan-raised Suzanne Kamata (pictured) raised her half-Japanese, half-American children in Japan while still trying to incorporate some of the American customs she grew up with.
Suzanne (pictured with her twins) admitted she felt like a ‘bad mum’ when her children started school, recalling how other mums were shocked by what she packed for lunch
The mother – whose children are now adults – recalled arranging playdates with other bicultural children, making sure to read books with bicultural characters in them to introduce them to the concept, and later writing and publishing her own .
She also introduced them to American foods, such as mac and cheese, as well as cultural traditions, such as Easter egg hunts.
But the mother said that when her children started school, she began to feel like she was a ‘bad mother’.
“It felt like I was doing everything wrong,” Suzanne confessed.
Since her daughter is deaf, she was enrolled in an early intervention program at the School for the Deaf, where Suzanne was expected to accompany their children every day.
“On one of the first days, I packed a sandwich, potato chips, fruit and cookies in a lunch box with a character from an American cartoon that my daughter enjoyed,” she recalls.
At school, she packed her daughter’s lunch, which was considered very normal by American standards, shocking the other mother’s in the class.
‘”Isn’t that junk food?” Suzanne recalled that another mother had asked her and said she had prepared a bento for her child with rice shaped into a Japanese cartoon character, small sausages cut into octopus shapes and carrots that looked like flowers.
She introduced her children to American foods, such as mac and cheese, as well as cultural traditions, such as Easter egg hunts
Suzanne said she and her children often forgot to bring things to school, which their teachers said did not ‘bode well’ for the future
However, the mother-of-two is happy to report her two children are well-adjusted young adults, adding: ‘occasionally eat mac and cheese, read a lot of books and forget things’
When she took her son to school for his first day, Suzanne found out that everyone else had enrolled their children in a large school, an intensive course that some students take to prepare them for lessons.
“Mine was the only one who didn’t know how to read and write and do basic math,” she confessed.
Another problem the teacher had was forgetfulness, with Suzanne admitting that there were times that between her and her children, some items from a long list of required things were left at home.
“The teachers always said that forgetfulness doesn’t bode well for the future,” she explained.
“I’m not sure what they thought would happen if they didn’t remember everything every day, but I know a lot of Japanese adults who forget things.”
Now, as a mother of two adults, Suzanne considers them well-adjusted adults, and says they: ‘sometimes eat mac and cheese, read a lot of books and forget things.’