I’m a cleaner for a family but feel uncomfortable around the husband who finds any excuse to talk to me and even complimented my hair – should I tell his wife?

A cleaning lady seeks advice on what to do about her creepy married client who makes her feel uncomfortable while cleaning his house.

The anonymous woman went to the British forum Mothernet asking others for advice on what to do about the situation.

She cleaned for this family for about six weeks and wrote that she was getting “strange feelings” from the man.

The woman revealed that she lived in a small village and met the man in a pub, when her boyfriend started talking to his friend.

She then revealed to him in conversation that she owned a local cleaning company. A month later, he booked a weekly cleaning through her Facebook business page.

She wrote: ‘Here’s the problem… When his wife is around he is very cold, reserved and professional towards me and keeps his distance.

“However, every time she leaves, he suddenly gets excited and always asks me about myself and talks to me. It’s almost like he’s making excuses to get into the room I’m in.

‘Obviously I talk to him and I’m nice because he pays me, but it’s a very noticeable change in his behavior.

“Last week, seconds after his wife left, he came straight downstairs from his office and started talking to me when he had no other reason to be downstairs.”

The woman said she recently got her hair done and the man noticed and sent her a complimentary text after she cleaned.

“I also recently got my hair done and he texted me after I finished cleaning asking if I got my hair done and complimented me on it. “Have you changed your hair? It really suits you”

“Taking into account the whole time I was there he didn’t talk to me because his wife was home so he noticed my hair and waited to text me privately.

“Is he just being nice or does this feel a little inappropriate?” I’m not sure if I’m exaggerating. I compare him to my other clients’ husbands and none of them are like that, so I think it’s weird.”

She asked other users on the website if she was being unreasonable or overreacting.

The anonymous woman took to British forum Mumsnet to ask others for advice on what to do about the situation

She also added that her mother raises money with the man’s wife and that “everyone knows each other in the village.”

“As much as I would love to show her the messages, the drama wouldn’t be worth it,” the cleaner wrote.

Mumsnetters used the thread, which was posted under the ‘Am I being unreasonable’ section of the website, to share their thoughts.

Some users felt that the cleaner should inform his wife about her husband’s inappropriate behavior.

One user wrote: ”I would talk to the woman right away, he’s going to try to turn this on your OP if the woman ever sees the messages on his phone.

‘If it’s a small town, approach her privately and explain clearly why you’re approaching her. It is best to be open and honest.’

Another said: ‘The text message with a compliment would totally freak me out, totally inappropriate. Resign and tell both of them – him and his wife (!) why you decided to quit.”

A third wrote: ‘If you can afford to quit and get another cleaning job I would text the woman, tell her I’m quitting, send her the man’s texts and let her know I’ve had enough of him, and then block him. them.

Some users felt that the cleaner should inform his wife about her husband’s inappropriate behavior

‘Continue. You are self-employed, with a good reputation and this will not damage it. If your mom asks, just show her the texts.”

But others said they should go quietly, with one suggesting she make an excuse as to why she has decided to leave.

One user wrote: ‘Since I live in a small town, the only thing I can do is quietly quit my job. Suppose you are busy, keep canceling for some reason, or simply say you have too much work.

“People do this all the time when they don’t want the work for some reason. The woman will quickly get bored and look for another cleaner.

‘That keeps everyone happy. I know I tend to avoid conflict. But in this case I think this is the right response.”

Another wrote: ‘I would just politely tell the woman I can’t do the job anymore. If you tell her what’s going on or show her the message, she won’t thank you or even believe you. If you stay, it will end in tears, as she will realize and blame you. He’s a creep, by the way.’

But others said they should go quietly, with one suggesting she make an excuse as to why she has decided to leave

A third said: ‘You know it’s inappropriate for him to text you like that and he’s escalating to test the situation; I would leave this job.

“The man sounds like the kind of sly dog ​​who will blame you when his advances go unrequited, and he could easily get revenge by spreading nasty lies about you throughout the village. Your life could become difficult if you get caught up in the family drama, and it doesn’t sound like this job is worth it.

“The wife will ‘believe’ anything he says (even if she doesn’t really) because the alternative (accepting her husband is a sleazeball) that she probably already knows is too hard for her to think about .’

A fourth commented: ‘Trust your instincts. Women are very good at knowing these things. If you feel like someone has bad intentions, you’re almost always right. I would quit the job.”

One user said that his behavior was not normal as he does not interact with his cleaner that way.

He wrote: ‘Not normal at all. We have a cleaner. I WFH. When she comes in, I make her a cup of tea, we have a chat and then I let her get on with it. I make another drink a few hours later but otherwise we don’t interact (unless she needs something), we are both at work.

‘My wife is here all the time at the moment due to ill health, although she is confined to bed. So it’s not like I wait until we’re alone, which your client does.’