Call me old fashioned. Call me anti-feminist. Call me Mrs. Tiggy-Winkle. I have a not-so-dirty secret: I love doing laundry.
A full laundry basket gives me a kick. A line of laundry blowing in the wind makes my heart beat faster.
And there’s something very pleasant about the sight of a pile of neatly folded, clean laundry.
We recently purchased a new washing machine. It has a handy little hatch through which you can place the socks that insist on escaping on the way to the machine, and it sings a cheerful tune at the end of the cycle.
I feign indifference, but the truth is that my new machine delights me.
A love for laundry: Natasha hangs out in her favorite place. She finds doing laundry almost meditative
I know, it’s 2023 and this isn’t the kind of thing women like me have to admit to.
We are meant to get satisfaction from our careers, not from the drudgery of household chores like some 1950s housewives.
Laundry, like cleaning the bath and making sure the kids have everything they need for the school day, is something we women either outsource, forcing our other halves to share, or squeeze in between high-level board meetings and important phone calls. It’s not something to enjoy.
But I’m no Stepford wife or domestic goddess – there’s probably not more than an inch of (Mrs) Hinch around me.
I like to outsource the cleaning and actively avoid washing dishes where possible. Luckily, I’m married to a champion washer-upper.
As a journalist, I am a working mother, and always have been.
My husband (a lawyer) and I think it is important that our twelve-year-old daughter and our nine-year-old son see that we both contribute to the domestic front.
That’s feminism in action – and it matters. Moreover, loving washing does not have to be exclusively a feminine activity: men can enjoy it too. In this regard, as in so many other things, I am all for equality.
Natasha, who does laundry six times a week, finds the idea of only one laundry day a week laughable
But when it comes to laundry, the man doesn’t get much attention. And that’s just the way I like it. Because washing is my therapy.
Wellness feels like a slippery, almost vague concept. Just the idea of navel gazing makes me itch.
I suspect the anti-stress patches Meghan Markle is wearing would have the same effect – literally. But give me a pile of laundry to fold…
Before you roll your eyes and scoff, hear me out.
Restoring order from chaos is one of life’s greatest endeavors. Even on the worst days (probably especially the worst days) when everything has gone wrong, everyone is in a terrible mood and your to-do list is invincible, doing laundry provides a little bit of control.
The methodical, repetitive rhythm of shaking, folding and smoothing is a tonic.
It’s almost meditative, allowing your mind to wander. It is an escape from the demands of the everyday.
When juggling work and kids – one of whom has a sworn devotion to sports and gets his knees and clothes as muddy as possible – the idea of only having one laundry day a week is laughable. I am a woman who eats at least six times a week.
She finds comfort in the methodical, repetitive rhythm of shaking, folding and smoothing, and happily volunteers to help wash others.
We have so little control over life, but the laundry will always be there. And who doesn’t find joy in clean, fresh-air-smelling sheets?
I would also argue that any therapy that serves the dual purpose of checking off an item on the endless list of domestic administration is a win. In times of stress I need my clean stroke.
I have even been known to meddle with other people’s laundry. When I picked up my son from a playdate, my eyes kept sliding to the window: it was clear that rain was coming.
My friend allowed me to guide us both outside to rescue the little ones, just as the first heavy raindrops fell.
I had the distinct impression that my sense of relief was all the more profound.
I was invited to a friend’s house for early evening drinks. She let us in and apologized for the state of the house.
My eyes fell on a drying rack that groaned under the weight of dry laundry. I politely offered (almost begged) to fold it.
Another friend jumped up to help – and I saw in her the light of a fellow laundry enthusiast.
Natasha’s new washing machine is equipped with a hatch through which you can place the socks that would like to escape on the way to the machine
Our joy was boundless when we chanced upon her ‘clean, strange sock box’ and reunited some long lost friends.
You see, I’m not alone. I text my mom and one of my oldest and dearest friends about “good drying days.” (The heat wave was a gift.) I might even start a WhatsApp group with this title.
When I shyly mentioned my love for laundry on Instagram, and instead of being criticized for being a bad feminist, which I feared, I received hundreds of messages from fellow addicts. People love the results, combined with the ritual.
Since then, my followers and fellow laundry enthusiasts have debated the merits of various washing powders; the joy of the perfect clothespin (we can all agree they’re from Nona, made from recycled ocean plastic no less, at made bynona.com); tumbled over the annoyance of an unexpected shower; the dizzying heights of whitest white.
And we’ve liked to wrap ourselves in nostalgia, remembering grandmothers who had a “laundry day.” How did they wait all week?
Laura Mountford, cleaner and laundry influencer, loves laundry so much she’s written a book about it: Live, Laugh, Laundry: A Calming Guide To Keeping Your Clothes Clean – And You Happy (£16.99, Ebury).
As @lauracleanaholic she has more than 620,000 followers on Instagram.
When we speak, Laura talks about “people like you and me,” which excites me. It’s like I’m in a laundress’s inner circle.
Natasha’s husband, Chris, may not understand her love affair with laundry, but he knows how to act quickly when an unexpected shower falls while clean clothes are hanging on the line.
For Laura, washing is ‘cheaper than therapy’; and if you do not understand that it is a pleasure and not a burden, then you are looking at it in the wrong way.
She says it’s all about mindset: “You can look at it as work, or you can turn it around and see it as a time to switch off from the other demands of life and enjoy it as an act of self-care.”
It’s Laura’s first port of call when she feels overwhelmed by chores. ‘If you don’t know where to start, the answer is your laundry basket. Put on that first load of laundry and you take back control of the day. The rest will find its way.”
Sophie Liard, another social media sensation (@thefoldinglady; her clothes folding tips attract 637,000 followers on Instagram and 4.4 million on TikTok) equates organized and perfectly folded laundry with a calmer, more productive life.
It can even curb your spending habits. “Once you get into a routine with your laundry, fold your clothes properly. Put the clothes you wear most in the most accessible places, then you realize what you have and buy less,” says Sophie. To see? Washing can change lives.
There will always be opponents. People who view laundry as boring, a necessary evil or housework.
My husband will never truly understand my love of laundry, but when I’m away and an unexpected shower falls with clean clothes hanging on the line, he knows it will strike fear in my heart, and he will act quickly.
Is there a better text from your husband than: ‘The laundry has arrived’?
Social media sensation Sophie Liard (@thefoldinglady) believes taking time to do laundry can also limit your spending habits by making you more aware of how much you have
He’s onto something with his “It’s important to you, so it’s important to me” approach.
The world would be a better place if we could all look past the idea of chores as menial drudgery and see them as an act of love.
Stop seeing them as mundane or, worse, as a burden, and reframe them as kindness: doing something nice for the people you love. Or yourself.
When I look at that pile of neatly folded school uniforms, sheets, towels and pairs of socks, I don’t see housework, I see my family.
I see that I did this to care for them and to show that they are loved. It has meaning.
Good thing too, because I hate ironing!