How ‘gray divorce’ is reshaping family dynamics: When older couples separate, fathers are more likely to lose contact with their children, study shows
- There has been a growing trend of ‘gray divorce’ in recent years
- Researchers have investigated the impact this has on their children
A divorce is always messy – you have to think about finances, living arrangements and of course the children.
But when it comes to older couples going their separate ways, fathers are more likely to lose touch with their children, a study suggests.
There has been a growing trend in recent years of ‘grey divorce’, where couples in long-term marriages separate after the age of 50.
Now researchers have studied the impact this has on their children.
Scientists analyzed data from 9,000 individuals, focusing on the frequency of contact with their parents, emotional closeness and provision of support – and how these were affected by the occurrence of gray divorce.
A divorce is always messy – you have to think about finances, living arrangements and of course the children. But when it comes to older couples going their separate ways, fathers are more likely to lose touch with their children, a study suggests (stock image)
They found that the effects vary significantly depending on the gender of both the parent and child involved.
First, the study found that gray divorce generally leads to a decrease in the frequency of contact between adult children and their fathers.
On the other hand, there was an increase in the frequency of contact and in emotional connection with mothers.
The researchers also found that the effects of divorce were generally more pronounced in father-daughter relationships, which experienced greater declines in both contact frequency and emotional closeness compared to father-son relationships.
Meanwhile, mother-daughter relationships often showed a strengthening of emotional bonds.
Zafer Büyükkeçeci, from the Max Planck Institute for Demographic Research in Germany, led the study.
He said: ‘Fathers tend to experience greater strain on parent-child relationships after divorce than mothers.
‘Reasons for the inequality may be that mothers traditionally often maintain closer ties with children.
Mother-daughter relationships often showed a strengthening of emotional bonds after a divorce (stock image)
‘Adult children may even strengthen bonds with mothers to compensate for the loss of a marital confidante.
‘Research also shows that mothers receive stronger emotional and practical support later in life.’
He also said that after divorce, fathers can lose their role as “family keepers,” which can lead to greater social isolation.
A “family keeper” is someone who supports family communication, plans meetings, and helps the family stay in touch.
The study, published in The Journals of Gerontology: Series B, said: ‘The health, well-being and social integration of older parents are strongly linked to the presence of a partner in the household and to the intergenerational solidarity of adult children.
‘The increase in gray divorces could undermine both of these crucial resources, as older people who separate not only lose their partners but can also damage relationships with their adult children.
‘Our central finding is the contrasting impact for mothers and fathers. A gray divorce undermines the solidarity of adult children towards mothers and puts fathers at risk of social isolation.’