I bought my girlfriend lingerie as a gift and now she won’t talk to me – did I do something wrong?

A man has an argument with his girlfriend after giving her a lingerie set as a gift – and no one can agree who is in the wrong.

The friend describes himself as an avid ‘gift giver’ and was looking online for inspiration on what to get his girlfriend when he came across the idea of ​​lingerie.

He hoped the provocative gift would boost his partner’s self-confidence, but instead she saw it as a “gift to herself” to “fulfill one of his fantasies.”

The 19-year-old said he and his girlfriend have a great relationship and that he “loves her very much,” but she sometimes struggles with her self-confidence and feeling good about herself.

“I regularly tell her how beautiful she looks and make standard compliments to cheer her up, which she appreciates,” he explained in a post on Reddit.

“I would say my love language is buying gifts and I usually get her flowers or little things that I think she would like.”

The boy in love felt his gifts were becoming too similar and wanted to shake things up with something different, so he turned to the Internet.

‘I was looking online for gift ideas for a partner and saw the idea of ​​lingerie. “I thought this could be perfect,” he said.

‘My girlfriend usually wears more ‘plain’ underwear, so I thought I could get her something that would make her feel confident/look good, while also having the benefit of being able to see her in it too .’

However, when the woman opened her gift, she was less than impressed.

‘Her reaction was not what I expected. She looked surprised, if not disgusted, and asked why I bought that for her. “I explained it was so she could feel confident/sexy and I thought she would appreciate it,” the man said.

‘She was extremely blunt and said the only reason I got this was to ‘fulfill one of my fantasies’ and that it was a gift ‘for me, not her’. She put it back in the bag and it’s just sitting in the corner of her room.”

The woman acted ‘distant’ towards her boyfriend for the rest of the evening before he tried to bring up the subject again.

The friend thought the gift would make his partner more confident, but she found the gesture ‘weird’ and she can wear any underwear she wants

“When I tried to talk to her, she said she thought it was a weird gift and that she could wear any underwear she wanted and that’s something she should buy,” he said.

‘I think it’s a pretty normal gift to buy a partner. Of course it was a bonus to see her in it, but I certainly wouldn’t say it was a gift ‘for me’, even if she’s still annoyed about it.”

The man asked if he was the hole in the situation, prompting hundreds of replies with a litany of differing opinions.

Some agreed with the man and said his girlfriend should have been grateful for the gift.

‘He bought a gift for his girlfriend that he thought they would both like. He had no malicious intentions at all. She didn’t like the gift and that was fine. You can return it,” said one user.

‘There is no way you could have predicted this very extreme reaction. I feel like she could have conveyed her feelings much better than this. It’s fine if she doesn’t like the gift but giving you the silent treatment and treating you like a weird pervert because you bought her damn underwear is weird,” a second wrote.

Others thought the girlfriend had a point, saying the gift was clearly more for him to enjoy than for her.

‘Men buy women’s lingerie so that men can see women in lingerie. If a woman wants lingerie for herself, she buys it for herself. And then there were your condescending comments that indicated she needed some help feeling confident and sexy. Your ulterior motives are quite clear and blatant,” someone replied.

Another agreed: “If it’s never something she’s ever let you know she wants, or is something you’ve ever talked about, and it’s something you want her to wear, then it seems that you check all the boxes of a gift for you instead of for her.

“It can convey the message of ‘I wish you were sexier,’ which can be the opposite message that someone lacking self-confidence needs.”

‘What would you have done if she accepted the lingerie and wore it and became more confident, but you never showed her in it? Would you still think this gift wasn’t for yourself?’ asked a third.

But regardless of which side they were on, most people agreed that the deceptive gift was “more bland than malicious.”