- Dan Stains played 190 games in the ARL
- Popular figure in stints at Sharks and then Tigers
- Overcame the death of his father and eldest sister
- Has called into question contemporary mental health care
Cronulla Sharks cult hero Dan Stains has revealed how he finally found inner peace in his life after the deaths of his father and sister when he was a child.
Stains, 59, is not a fan of psychological counseling as he believes it has been largely ineffective as he sought ways to cope with his personal trauma.
After growing up on a dairy farm in remote Queensland, Stains’ life was turned upside down when his father died at the age of 52.
He had gone to hospital for a routine operation and never returned home, leaving Stain’s heartbroken mother to raise six children.
The family soon moved to Toowoomba, and a few years later tragedy struck again when his eldest sister was killed at a charity car rally.
Cronulla Sharks cult hero Dan Stains has revealed how he finally found inner peace in his life after the deaths of his father and sister when he was a child
Stains (pictured recently) was recruited by the Sharks after being a standout for Brothers in Brisbane, playing under legendary coach Jack Gibson in 1987.
Rugby league provided a much-needed outlet and after impressing at Brisbane Brothers, Stains signed for Cronulla, where he played under legendary coach Jack Gibson.
Although premiership success eluded Stains, he went on to carve out an impressive career, representing Halifax in England and the Balmain Tigers.
Coaching was Stains’ next challenge, and after leading the Tigers to a reserve grade grand final, he appeared to be on his way as he barked instructions.
However, a conversation with his mentor Gibson provided a shock that Stains did not expect, after the original Supercoach questioned his life philosophy, which he called ‘flawed’.
It turned out to be final: Stains soon found himself looking in the mirror and constantly doubting everything he did.
He eventually became coach at the London Broncos, but was sacked in 1999 after a string of poor results.
Stains has written a book called ‘What Now’, which provides resources for players looking to transition to the next stage of life after hanging up their boots
Two marriages and a lot of noise followed, before Stains came to accept that his ego was holding him back.
But the breakthrough didn’t come because he used professional help.
“A lot is said about mental health awareness and mindfulness these days, but it can be quite painful to go through,” he said.
After finally discovering the inner peace he longed for by deeply reviewing his own life experiences – both good and bad – a noticeably slimmer Stains has written a book called ‘What Now’.
It provides resources for football stars who want to successfully transition to the next stage of life after hanging up their boots.
“The book is the culmination of me starting at a young age, overcoming trauma and all the (life) lessons I learned,” he said.
“Hopefully I’m an older person who has discovered that you can only do your best every day.”