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Parents dread the moment their child bursts into tears, kicks and screams in a fit of rage — but experts reveal that tantrums are helpful for your little one’s development.
Meltdowns are a physiological response related to the brain’s natural sensing system triggered by a child’s inability to control emerging emotions.
Letting them go helps little ones eliminate the feelings that can get in the way of their natural, cooperative selves.
Rachel FitzD, a baby and parenting expert, told DailyMail.com, “Just like you and me, kids of any age can become emotionally overwhelmed, they can respond by breaking down.
“Your child will cope more easily with their overwhelm in the future if you’ve given them space to get through the experience safely, with their self-esteem intact, and with loving compassion and respect from you.”
Terrible tantrums are helpful for your little one’s development. Meltdowns are a physiological response related to the brain’s natural threat-detection system, caused by a child’s inability to control emerging emotions
Tantrums usually start around 18 months and are very common in toddlers. And it usually gets worse at ages two and three — hence the “terrible twos” saying.
Researchers have found that tantrums occur in 87 percent of children ages 18 to 24 months, 91 percent of children ages 30 to 36 months, and 59 percent of children ages 42 to 48 months.
“This is a normal human response, and the only difference between them and us is that we have gained enough experience and maturity to learn avoidance and coping strategies,” said FitzD, who is also an expert speaker at The baby show.
Meltdowns begin in early toddlerhood – from about the first birthday – as the toddler develops a deeper and more complex emotional life.
“We see the good side of this as they pounce on us with adoration for kisses and hugs, and charm us with their delight in life’s smallest pleasures. But just as they cannot easily regulate their joyful exuberance, they are not yet able to control the dark side of their newly emerging emotions.”
Until their cortex is developed, the only way a young child can tell you what’s bothering them is by expressing their feelings.
“Children with language delays or autism may have more frequent and more aggressive tantrums because of the added frustration that comes with difficulty expressing themselves,” said one paper published by Laura Sisterhen and Paulette Ann W. Wy with the University of Arkansas.
Parents are often perplexed about what caused the outburst, but according to FitzD, hunger is one of the main triggers.
‘Toddlers and young children have a lot of energy and grow quickly in body and brain, so they need a constant supply of food. But they have very small stomachs – just the size of their closed fists,” she said.
Rachel FitzD, an expert on babies and parenting, told DailyMail.com, “Like you and me, when kids of any age become emotionally overwhelmed, they can respond by having a meltdown.
Parents are often perplexed as to what caused the outburst, but FitzD reveals several causes, one being hunger and the other being fatigue and frustration
“The reason little ones will overlook broccoli in favor of brown bread and butter is not because of a poor upbringing, but because broccoli simply fills the stomach but provides minimal calories.”
“Without a fairly steady stream of healthy carbs, fats and fruit sugars, the ‘hang’ sets in, the brain can’t think straight and the slightest thing will push it over the edge.”
The other two are fatigue and frustration, which are usually easily noticed.
“Little ones seem to have boundless energy, but any parent of a toddler knows that if they skip a nap or a ‘quiet time,’ their little darling will go rogue,” FitzD said.
“While they may be able to tolerate you wrestling them in their coats when they’re well rested, try the same move when they’re sleep deprived, and you’ll probably be locked in miserable chaos for the next hour.”
“Tots can handle a little hunger or fatigue, but put frustration in there and your child will just be overwhelmed.”
And while you may lose hope when you see your little one start to clench his little fists, there are ways to minimize the inevitable blowout.
It’s always best to try to cope with a meltdown at the pass by making sure your child has plenty of access to healthy, nutritious snacks to avoid those “hangry” outbursts,” FitzD said.
‘[Also make sure they are] regular opportunities for rest time and that you give your toddlers, children and teens a lot of independence and autonomy.
“Of course there will be times when it’s just not appropriate to let your child do things for themselves, but really try to minimize those times – you’ll save yourself a lot of work too!”
“If you see a meltdown brewing, use your cunning to distract and divert the little ones, and kindly point out to the elderly that you can see their frustration and ask them what might help. learn to regulate themselves and discover their own coping strategies.’