Fed up with online dating, I handed out ‘I think you’re cute’ cards to strangers. Here’s what happened next…

My legs were shaking as I desperately fumbled through my handbag. Painful seconds passed before my shaking fingers managed to pull out what I was looking for: a small piece of card, no bigger than my bank card.

I was convinced that this could finally be my key to a romantic paradise.

Trying to show an equanimity I didn’t feel, I moved with speed, my target firmly in my sights: early thirties, dark hair, a friendly smile. I quickly handed him my card, to his obvious surprise, before fleeing the train car, blood roaring in my ears.

What on earth was I planning, you might ask?

Well, even though my mother always told me not to approach a stranger – especially never on public transport – I had grown so tired of the heartbreaking sterility of dating apps that I decided to take a new approach to finding love.

Forget swiping right. I had printed my own ‘dating cards’ – think business cards, but for flirting.

And it was this card that I dished out on the Tube, hoping that a direct approach would be more rewarding than recent disappointing adventures on the app Hinge.

The message of my card was simple: ‘H! I think you are cute. My name is Sophie. I’m tired of dating apps, so if you like me too, please contact me.’ It also included my Instagram handle and email address.

So could dating cards be the modern Cupid’s arrow I needed?

They certainly can’t be worse than dating apps. Since becoming single in January 2022 after the end of a seven-year relationship, my online attempts to find a boyfriend have only succeeded in finding the most emotionally unavailable men in London.

I first read about dating cards on Twitter, where they are a trend – where else? – New York.

The next day I had 50 self-designed dating cards printed. Now I just had to find the courage to hand them out: me, who in my 29 years has never given out my number in a bar, or talked to a stranger.

But ‘business cards’ were different: it was a ‘hit-and-run’ approach, involving very little small talk. I could handle that… right?

That evening I went to a comedy show with a friend, Eliza. ‘Perfect’, I thought. ‘A room full of men with a sense of humor.’

Armed with half my cards, I walked to the subway station – and saw a man who was exactly my type coming towards me.

With my heart pounding, I reached into my bag and gave him my details… and froze on the spot as he passed me unknowingly.

I was annoyed with myself. I wouldn’t have paid good money for those stupid cards just not to hand them out!

As I tried to shake off the nerves and arrived to meet Eliza, I eagerly awaited my next opportunity. But when we walked into the venue, it was full of girls enjoying a fun night out.

And when comedian Grace Campbell asked if there were any heterosexual men among the 750 strong, there was silence.

“Not one person?” Grace roared. ‘I’m going home!’ The two of us together.

Undeterred, Eliza and I went to a pub and, emboldened by the wine, I knowingly dealt my cards. A risky moment came when I gave my card to a guy… only to notice his wedding ring as he took it.

I shrugged this off, carried on and felt hopeful as I handed a card to a tall, handsome man who held the door open for us to leave the pub.

I even spent two on the long bus ride home, which earned me a smile and a thumbs up through the window from a man who had waited until he was safely on the sidewalk before reading it.

However, I received no messages. It felt much worse than the rejections on dating apps, since I had contacted these people in real life.

After all, making the effort to hand out a card involves a certain vulnerability and shows that I was serious about dating. The least I expected was a simple “Thanks, but no thanks” message.

Confidence waned and I carried on as I traveled to King’s Cross station to catch the train back to my home town of Leeds.

Naively thinking that my mission would become easier (due to Eliza’s prompting and the false confidence of alcohol the night before), I saw an attractive man on the subway.

Once again the adrenaline took hold and my legs trembled as I waited for the perfect opportunity to hand over my card, which I did when he reached his stop.

Once at the station I went to the train and saw that I had a message request on Instagram. My stomach jumped. Was this it?

‘Hi! I really appreciated the card you shared with me on the Tube today,” read the message from a man named Travis.

“Not only is it brave to step out of your comfort zone like that, but it made me smile and I love that you’re bringing joy into the world.”

So far, so good. Until…

‘Unfortunately I have a girlfriend so sorry to waste a card, but I think it’s a great idea and I saw your beautiful eyes before you shared it!

‘I’m sure you’ll catch many in the Tube with the same brilliance. Good luck and keep it up.’

Although it wasn’t what I was hoping for, Travis’ lovely message encouraged me to hand out more cards in Leeds – including one in perhaps the city’s rowdiest pub – and as I traveled back to London.

At that point I was pretty sure Transport for London would flag me for requests.

Still, my day was made when a shy, studious man took my card and looked delighted, even though it made the lady sitting across from me burst out laughing. Like Travis said, I spread a little joy – what was wrong with that?

But I started to give up hope. Then I got another message on Instagram.

“Hello, you gave me your card at Starbucks last week. “I think you’re cute too,” it said.

After chatting for a while it turns out that Dan, dark-haired and blue-eyed, and I have a lot in common. We like the same music and our upbringings were similar. We set up a date this week. So watch this space.

Would I Recommend Dating Cards to Help Find Love?

Once you get over the crippling fear and learn to deal with that dizzying rush of adrenaline, the cards gave me the same dopamine highs as swiping on an app.

I felt downright jubilant when I finally started handing them out – something I never thought I would have the confidence to accomplish.

I felt such a sense of power, which I had long been missing in my meandering dating life.

Once I learned not to expect a response just because I gave someone a card, I relaxed into it – even if I had to battle some strange looks and whispers from the general public.

In fact, it’s so successful that I always have one or two dating cards on hand. After all, you never know who is around the corner…