There’s no doubt that the body positivity movement is bigger than ever and, don’t get me wrong, it’s a great message to spread.
‘Embrace your curves’ and ‘love the skin you’re in’ are in most female-targeted marketing campaigns and I respect and support every word.
But what if those well-meaning mantras don’t work for you? What if you don’t even like the skin you’re in?
Sure, my body was lumpy and bumpy from having people growing in it, but honestly, I didn’t want to wear that with pride, and looking in the mirror just made me miserable.
So as I neared the end of my maternity leave at the age of 39, I decided to do something about it and booked a cheap mommy makeover abroad.
On a mission to get some sun, sea and surgery, I immediately joined a bunch of Facebook groups to explore my options.
There was no denying that the results people shared were great, but the prices were much higher than I expected.
A mummy makeover in Thailand started at $17,000 (£8,500), or $11,000 (£5,500) for a facelift, and once I added flights and accommodation there was no way I could afford it anymore.
Jonica Bray first thought about medical tourism at the end of her maternity leave, at the age of 39
I got a mummy makeover in Manila with plastic surgeon Dr. Joel Unson (before and after procedure photo)
My recovery was great and I was walking around slowly after just a few days
Turkey was another cheap option, but the flight prices and the huge twenty-hour trek from my home in Australia put me off.
Then I came across a message about the Philippines.
After holidaying there a few times, I felt quite confident in the infrastructure and general safety standards, so I looked into it further.
I soon found plastic surgeon Dr. Joel Unson, who had hundreds of great before-and-after photos and five-star reviews.
We did a Zoom consultation and then Joel sent me to get blood tests and x-rays done and have the results sent to him.
My package cost $12,500 (£6,300) and included flights, accommodation, a tummy tuck, a breast augmentation, muscle separation, a mons lift (also known as a pubic lift) and all necessary tests and medications.
The Philippines actually has very strict rules around elective surgeries, and I also had to undergo independent health tests, scans, more blood, and a meeting with a psychologist.
I’m not going to lie: there were a few tears the night before the surgery. I had all kinds of mom guilt for risking my life for vanity.
I cried a little the night before I went down and felt guilty about the whole mom thing
My swelling after my facelift was crazy and I was worried about whether I would be allowed on the flight home
I was in Manila for two weeks before the doctor cleared me to fly home. (Photo: Jonica before and after her facelift, from the front and from the side)
A few weeks before my 40th birthday I was asked for ID – this is a photo from that night
Apparently that was also on my mind when I woke up after the operation, because apparently I was yelling at everyone that I “should have gone to Thailand” and that they had “messed it all up and were going to regret it.”
I was terrified, but felt a little better when they told me it was common and that they had heard worse.
Fortunately, no one had really messed up and my surgery was a success. I was happy with the results.
So happy, in fact, that six months later I returned to Manila for a second round of surgery.
This time I have Dr. Chosen Rino Lorenzo for my lower facelift, upper eyelift, liposuction for my annoying double chin and a fat transfer from my thighs to my cheeks. However, his approach was not as gentle as Dr. Unson’s.
“You look like an old lady,” Dr. Lorenzo said to me as he poked my cheeks. “It’s really bad.”
Seeing my jaw move in the mirror, I quickly decided to forgive his shocking bedside manner and handed over my credit card.
All in all, the operation cost me $6,800 (£3,400) plus $400 (£200) budget flights on Cebu Air, and my hotel cost about $90 (£45) per night.
I pre-warned the doctor of the possibility of a verbal attack when I came to, but I was clearly more relaxed that time and I’m happy to report that no medical staff took offense.
After the surgery my swelling was crazy and I could barely recognize myself in the mirror. I was honestly worried that they wouldn’t let me fly home because I looked nothing like my passport photo.
But after 14 days I felt completely clear and went home looking like a new woman.
And honestly, this sounds made up, but I swear it happened: a few weeks later, right before my 40th birthday, I was asked for ID!
Look, the swelling was still pretty bad, and my sister screamed when I Facetimed her, but I’ll take it as a compliment.