Elegance coach reveals 10 things that cheapen your online profile
An elegance expert has revealed the 10 social media pitfalls to avoid if you don’t want to cut corners on your online presence.
Anna Bey, who lives between London and Geneva, posted a video on her YouTube channel warning that ‘mistakes can cost you opportunities and sabotage your future’.
The expert shared the mistakes she’s made in the past to stop others from doing the same.
She said things like sharing pictures of yourself drinking, posting inspirational or passive-aggressive quotes, or sharing too much on a bad day are all things that tarnish and stay on your online profile.
She also explained the difference between “provocative or sexy photos or videos,” and suggested that highly revealing “thirst-trap” images posted with the intent of enticing viewers should be avoided.
Here, FEMAIL takes a look at Anna’s top tips for a stylish and well-curated social media profile…
Anna Bey is an expert on elegance and etiquette based in London and Geneva. The elegance coach uses her YouTube channel to give people etiquette advice
1. Don’t post provocative photos
According to Anna, there is a difference between a sexy photo and a provocative photo (stock photo)
According to Anna, there is a difference between a sexy photo and one that is provocative, explaining: “We have two kinds of provocative photos online.
“We have the obvious sexy pictures, and then we have the quiet, non-obvious sexy pictures.”
She showed a photo of women playing basketball in bikinis, calling it a “typical, non-obvious, but sexy photo” with the girls playing ball, but “we all know what we’re looking at.”
She then showed a gallery of women posing on beds in their underwear as an example of “clear, sexy and provocative photos.”
The expert pointed out that these images will stay on the internet forever, which is why he said it’s important not to be overly provocative when creating a cute, sexy image.
2. Don’t share your love life or partner too much online
Anna said you shouldn’t brag about your relationship every day or every week because it can be ‘nauseous’ (stock photo)
Anna said she doesn’t understand why some couples feel the need to be very active on social media, “posting intimate photos or videos or stories about the relationship all the time.”
She listed photos from kissing and cuddling to touching intimate parts and lying in bed half-naked, and she insisted that “you shouldn’t share too much about your personal relationship online.”
Having an occasional “husband appreciation message” or the like for Valentine’s Day or the like is a sophisticated and balanced way to show online how much you love your partner, according to Anna.
But she insisted that you don’t brag about your relationship every day or every week because that can be “sickening.”
3. Don’t put passive-aggressive quotes
The elegance expert used the example of women posting ambitious quotes clearly targeting men as a sign of immaturity on social media (stock photo)
Posting passive-aggressive quotes on social media in the hopes that the person you’re annoyed with will see is one of Anna’s annoyances.
She noted that it’s “so ridiculous” that people on Instagram and Twitter are posting random passive-aggressive quotes that are clearly targeting someone.
4. Do not post pictures with cigarettes or alcohol
If you want to look more elegant, never let yourself be photographed with cigarettes or alcohol in the photo, the expert said.
Anna said you don’t want to be photographed grabbing bottles or seen with cigarettes and you definitely don’t want pictures of yourself partying.
“That’s one of those times when you want to be a little more discreet,” she noted.
She explained that you should try to hide your drink even if there’s an official photographer at a party because “that picture will probably stay online forever.”
Anna said, “You don’t really want to promote your bad habits.”
But recognized that there are situations that are an exception, such as an Instagram story toasting a champagne glass with your girlfriends.
She said, “There is always a deeper message behind what is said in the quote. It was placed there for a reason.’
She labeled this behavior “immature” and advised discussing issues behind closed doors rather than sending “these hidden messages.”
The elegance expert used the example of women posting something along the lines of, “Don’t let him have the satisfaction of knowing you’ll always be there waiting.”
He won’t care even if he sees it and so if you want to look classy and have to do this immature behavior, this isn’t something you should do, the expert said.
5. Don’t go online if you’ve had too much to drink
According to Anna, you should never go online when you’re drunk or “even when you’re tipsy.”
Many of us get a “drunk voice,” she explained, even if you’ve only had two glasses of wine, “we can hear it because the voice has changed.”
It’s the same for speech, as it slows down when you’re a little drunk and you can start to slurp.
Anna said, “Include yourself in stories where you say things that you think are funny, but aren’t really funny, and that’s where you are. That certainly makes a social media presence cheaper.’
6. Don’t brag about yourself online
Anna asked, “What is it with people who want to brag online?” In answer to her own question, she concluded that “it comes down to sheer uncertainty.”
Bragging rights are something that is now very common on social media as people compete for who has the most of something or who does the coolest.
“They really go out of their way to make it clear to the viewer that they have a lot,” the expert noted.
She said that in her experience, people who have a lot don’t promote it and tend to be more discreet.
If you want to look more elegant, never let yourself be photographed with cigarettes or alcohol in the photo, says Anne (stock photo)
7. Don’t be a drama queen
According to the elegance expert, drama queens exist in abundance on social media, describing it as, “Their secret little hub, because that’s where they get all the attention.”
10. Don’t use ‘cheap influencer’ tactics
Finally, Anna appealed to women trying to become influencers and advised them against “cheap influencer tactics that some people use.”
As an example, she said, “Participating in these strange obscure giveaways is kind of a low-level giveaway that definitely makes a person or their brand so cheap.”
Anna explained that this type of person can leave a cryptic post and then disappear, leaving people wondering ‘what’s going on now? what happened? did something happen?’
Anna said it’s normal and expected to have some drama in your life, but advised people not to make a habit of it.
8. Don’t post when you’re in a bad mood
Anna said she doesn’t mind being vulnerable online or in person and does show some parts of her intimate life.
“But,” she said, “I have a rule that if I’m too negative or if I’m having a really bad day, I don’t go online.
“I’m keeping it to myself because why would I share all this negativity with other people and ruin their day?”
Sometimes you have to share negative news or maybe share some inner thoughts, but she emphasized “it’s about how much you do of it.”
9. Do not post content in low light
“So one thing I’m very careful about on social media because of the aesthetic that is light,” Anna said.
The elegance expert explained that it is difficult to get good photos at night because they are often grainy, blurry, or in strange colors and often unflattering.
She advised taking all your photos during the day, when bright colors come out. This will apparently give you a much more flattering social media feed.