Dr. Ruth Westheimer dead at 96: Sex therapist who became pop icon, media star and best-selling author passes away at her NYC home
Renowned sex therapist Dr. Ruth Westheimer has died at the age of 96.
Westheimer died Friday at her home in New York City, surrounded by her family, according to publicist and friend Pierre Lehu.
The petite sexologist grew into a pop icon, media star and bestselling author thanks to her candid conversations about once taboo subjects in the bedroom.
Westheimer never advocated risky sexual behavior, but encouraged open dialogue about previously hidden issues that affected her audience of millions.
Her recurring theme was that there was nothing to be ashamed of.
Renowned sex therapist Dr. Ruth Westheimer has died at the age of 96
“I still hold to old-fashioned values and I’m a little bit of a wimp,” she told students at Michigan City High School in 2002. “Sex is a private art and a private matter. But it’s still a topic we need to talk about.”
Westheimer’s giggly, German-accented voice, combined with her 4-foot-10 frame, made her an unlikely-looking — and sounding — outlet for “sexual literacy.” This contradiction was one of the keys to her success.
But it was her extensive knowledge and training, combined with her humorous, non-judgmental attitude, that propelled her local radio program, “Sexually Speaking,” into national attention in the early 1980s.
She had a non-judgmental attitude toward what two consenting adults were doing in the privacy of their own home.
“Tell him you’re not going to initiate it,” she told a concerned caller in June 1982. “Tell him Dr. Westheimer said you won’t die if he doesn’t have sex for a week.”
Her radio success opened new doors, and in 1983 she wrote the first of more than 40 books, Dr. Ruth’s Guide to Good Sex, which demystified sex with both rationality and humor. There was even a board game, Dr. Ruth’s Game of Good Sex.
Westheimer died Friday at her home in New York City, surrounded by her family
The petite sex therapist became a pop icon, media star and bestselling author for her candid conversations about once taboo topics in the bedroom
She soon became a regular guest on television talk shows, bringing her personality to national attention.
Her rise coincided with the early days of the AIDS epidemic, when candid conversations about sex became a necessity.
“If we could talk about sexual activity the way we talk about diet — the way we talk about food — without it having the connotation that something is wrong, we would be a step ahead. But we have to do it in good taste,” she told Johnny Carson in 1982.
She normalized the use of words like “penis” and “vagina” on radio and television, aided by her Jewish grandmotherly accent, which The Wall Street Journal called “a cross between Henry Kissinger and Minnie Mouse.”
People magazine included her in their list of ‘The Most Intriguing People of the Century.’
Westheimer pictured with Ryan Seacrest at the Radio Hall of Fame Class of 2019 Induction Ceremony at Gotham Hall on November 8, 2019
She even turned it into a Shania Twain song: ‘No, I don’t need no proof to show the truth/Not even Dr. Ruth’s gonna tell me how I feel.’
Westheimer defended abortion rights, suggested that older people have sex after a good night’s sleep, and was an outspoken advocate of condom use. She believed in monogamy.
In the 1980s, she stood up for gay men during the height of the AIDS epidemic and was a vocal advocate for the LGBTQ community.
She said she was defending people who some far-right Christians consider “subhuman” because of her own past.