POrnography was not something Amelia Lander-Cavallo thought much about. Until they were asked to host a podcast on the subject. Lander-Cavallo had “kind of given up on porn for a variety of reasons,” but as a blind, non-binary drag performer, he is deeply concerned with the representation of the sexuality of people with disabilities, as he feels they are often infantilized or rejected.
“In general – and this is one of the main reasons why I was so excited to make this podcast – it is very important to me that people understand that people with disabilities are sexual,” they explain via Zoom from the home in Sheffield that they share with their wife Al. which is just out of shot. “Most people just don’t assume that people with disabilities have sex, think about sex, care about sex – and consume porn, are interested and aroused by porn. So it was great to talk to people who have made this their entire career.”
In Press Play, Turn On, a new six-part podcast from Audible, Lander-Cavallo delves into the world of audio pornography for queer and disabled people, from those who write the stuff to the sultry sex workers who record it from home. . Think: spoken descriptive erotica with lots of heavy panting and skin-on-skin slapping sounds. Most audio pornography is less about ‘listening to people having sex’ and more story-driven stories of people describing what they ‘do to you’, or vice versa. And just like with visual pornography, there are variations (in episode two, Lander-Cavallo contradicts Chelseawho makes audio pornography with dragons, monsters and angels).
During their adolescence in the early 2000s, Lander-Cavallo, 40, in Albuquerque, New Mexico, couldn’t find mainstream pornography that suited them. In fact, the pornography they discovered was often not only inaccessible, but disturbing (imagine looking for pornography for blind people and coming across a bunch of videos fetishizing people with disabilities; that will be a turn-off). “If I get into something to have a good time, and what I get is something ableist or transphobic, then I’m much less likely to engage with it. Unfortunately, that has been my experience for a long time.”
That experience is not unusual, even by today’s standards, when there is probably every form of pornography you can imagine. Most people would think of mainstream pornography of the kind available on PornHub: flashy videos of men and women moaning uncontrollably after lacking foreplay, or glossy women reenacting unrealistic lesbian sex for a supposed male gaze. Which, as Lander-Cavallo says, clearly excites a lot of people. “I don’t want to push someone’s delicacy,” is a phrase they often use. But it also means that there are groups of people who do not get off the ground in that way, because pornography is for sighted people, or because it only focuses on a certain part of society. And don’t assume that adding audio description to PornHub’s most viewed clips will solve the problem either. In the opening episode, Lander-Cavallo listens to a spoken clip from Kim Kardashian’s sex tape on PornHub, which sounds distinctly flat, oddly technical, and deeply unsexy (no one wants to hear the camera “scanning the room”).
By means of Press Play, Turn OnLander-Cavallo interviews many people in the world of audio pornography, from disabled trans sex blogger Quinn Rhodes to founder of a disabled sex toy company Andreas Gurzaas well as NSFW voter Krystine Kellogg (who has such a syrupy voice that sounds tailor-made for dirty stories). Many of these interviewees say the same thing: that she Since he couldn’t find the pornography, sex toys or erotica they wanted, they cleared the space themselves (Rhodes describes himself as a “slut beyond words” and can only have an orgasm through audio pornography. That’s why he became a sex blogger). Ultimately, in the midst of all this, Lander-Cavallo begins to wonder: If I want the perfect audio pornography, why not just make it myself?
In a seventh bonus episode, Lander-Cavallo’s commissioned pornography – written and recorded by queer content creator Verbalifyouplease – finally arrives for you to listen to in full. It was created specifically for a blind perspective: sexually descriptive, aural, beautifully recorded. Even seemingly small details, such as a keyboard in the corner of the room, or the way sunlight filters through the window, receive attention. But be warned: this isn’t something you should listen to on public transport or out loud in the family home (a husky voice slowly describes bumping into ‘you’ in front of your aroused partner. This is pornographic, so. ..don’t press play while waiting for a mildly erotic story).
You might assume that a lack of queer pornography and a lack of pornography for people with disabilities are two completely different issues. In many ways it is. But, Lander-Cavallo argues, they are also inextricably linked in the sense that mainstream media – including mainstream pornography – often fails to acknowledge non-normative sex lives or audiences (think of how often you have a wheelchair user portrayed having sex on television, or two transgender people.) “Queerness and disability are not the same, but they are cousins in the sense that they have many similarities that intersect and connect,” says Lander-Cavallo. And of course, like Lander-Cavallo, queer disabled people also exist. So it made sense to dive into audio pornography with an intersectional lens.
Throughout the podcast, Lander-Cavallo talks a lot of about authenticity and its necessity in pornography. For them it is essential that pornographic artists are the identity with which they perform. This is a debate that rages far beyond the confines of the porn industry (we often hear about it in the context of film and pop music). Does it matter if queer pornography is performed by a queer person? Should lesbian sex only be portrayed by lesbians? My gut reaction at first is: no. In the realm of sexual fantasy, where everything is heightened and invented, surely the most important thing is to be aroused? I don’t care about a person’s sex life, as long as it’s believable enough. However, the more I listen, the more I understand Lander-Cavallo’s thinking, which is that context matters, both in terms of usability and ethics. This is especially true when it comes to disability and the way it is portrayed.
“I feel like you can tell if someone is having a good time, so a lot of it comes down to that,” they say. I tell them I agree: a lot of people don’t like fake-sounding sex moans. “But on a more political level, queer people, people with disabilities and trans people don’t get enough representation. So if you have a role that was created with them in mind, and with you still don’t put them in that role, it’s just baffling. And I think, cool, if I get to play a role where I’m a pilot and no one blinks, then we can talk about pretending to be blind. But until that happens… oh well.”
Press Play, Turn On covers a lot of serious issues, but don’t be fooled into thinking this is an overly serious podcast. It’s educational for those who aren’t blind, of course, but there’s a lot of laughing and informal banter throughout (at one point a blooper plays where a voice actor has to stop halfway through the pornographic script because their kids are stomping around upstairs ).
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Lander-Cavallo hopes Press Play, Turn On can shed light on an industry that has grown exponentially since the pandemic (the audio porn app Dipsea saw a 84% increase in subscribers 2020). “There is definitely a growing need and desire for audio porn,” they say. “So that allows an industry to innovate in ways that make porn a better, more enjoyable experience for everyone, and something people can listen to.” In other words, as demand grows, accessibility must also increase.
“My hope is that (audio pornography) continues to be made in a way that treats sex workers ethically, safely and as pleasantly as possible, and that they are praised for that work. And that accessibility is constantly being considered.” The more open the world, the fairer it will be – and that includes pornography.