I refuse to let my daughter be around my convicted rapist brother-in-law – everyone in the family is angry at me
a Reddit user has drawn the line when it comes to allowing a criminal family member to get near her daughter.
The married mother revealed in her post that her 28-year-old brother-in-law John spent 12 years in prison after being convicted of kidnapping and rape.
She and her husband have since refused to allow the convicted felon near their two children, including the woman’s 13-year-old daughter.
“Everyone in the family is extremely angry with me for ‘doing his time and paying his dues…’” she wrote.
“I refuse to believe the excuses and firmly stand by not allowing this man near my child.”
A woman posted on Reddit yesterday, writing that she refuses to allow her brother-in-law to see her daughter and stepdaughter after he was convicted of kidnapping and rape
John, 28, was sentenced to 12 years in prison for his crimes. He has since been released, but she still won’t allow him to see the children
The original poster’s (OP) daughter is 13 years old and only two years younger than John’s victim
John’s victim was a 15-year-old girl he had befriended on Facebook.
According to the woman, the teenage victim told John she was “escaping an abusive home life” and then claimed her father sexually abused her and withheld food.
“John went to pick her up and left the state with her, where they began a sexual relationship,” the OP wrote.
“It was never announced whether or not ‘consent’ was given, because that was not stated in the report.”
However, due to the age of the victim, the OP claimed that the crime was considered forcible rape.
‘It was actually considered forcible rape. She had just turned 15 (literally the month before),” she wrote.
’16 is the age of consent so it wasn’t considered legal and that only applies if there’s a six year age gap – not 13.’
After twelve years behind bars, John was released from prison two years ago and has since been a registered sex offender.
John may have done time for his crimes, but it’s not enough that the wife and mother allow him near her daughter and stepdaughter.
He befriended the victim on Facebook and the pair began a sexual relationship while crossing state lines. He admitted in a letter that he had committed all the crimes
“I don’t care if he is ‘reformed’ and ‘found Jesus.’ I don’t care if he openly admits it was a mistake and apologizes,” she wrote.
“He still caught a kid who’s about the same age as my daughter.”
John’s family contacted her yesterday asking everyone to discuss the matter.
The OP’s in-laws were at the discussion and they revealed that John would be at her niece’s 12th birthday party.
“They asked if I would hold out for a few hours for my nieces and said, ‘We will all make sure John is not near your daughter, we will keep a close eye on it,'” she wrote.
“They’re all convinced he’s reformed anyway, so I don’t trust them to keep an eye on my child because they all think he’s ‘cured’ and ‘wouldn’t do that to his family.’
Although the OP remained stern about the situation, she found her husband crying in a bathroom later that day.
During a family conversation, her in-laws told the OP that John would be attending her niece’s 12th birthday party despite his criminal past
The Reddit poster and her husband no longer speak to each other after the two got into an ugly argument at home
“I knocked on the door and saw him sitting on the edge of the tub,” she wrote in her post.
Instead of seeking comfort, her husband became angry and “unleashed a world of hurt.”
The OP claimed her husband told her he was “f****** sick of being in the middle of it” and that he felt like she was making him choose between his family.
“He said he’s angry at all of us and starting to hate us all because we won’t “shut up” and won’t stop “giving him ultimatums…,” she indicated.
“I know he’s hurt now, but I will never tolerate the lack of concern for my own child after what that man did.”
Despite the pain her husband felt, the OP claimed in her post that he hasn’t forgiven his sibling and that he even thinks his brother is “sick in the head.”
When the OP’s husband was raising her daughter, she told him to leave their house, and the two haven’t spoken since.
Reddit users have trashed the woman’s family and many of them have written that she is an NTA (not the a******) in this situation.
Reddit users trashed the woman’s husband and family. They are also praised for doing everything she can to protect her daughter
More than one Reddit user has praised the OP for doing everything she can to protect her daughter.
“You are a good mother if you protect your child,” someone wrote on Reddit.
“It seems your husband would rather have a pedophile around your daughter than morals.”
A few Reddit users have made suggestions about what the OP should do — ranging from calling John’s probation officer to taking her 13-year-old daughter to a self-defense class.
“Do what you do now to keep her away from that creep, but also give her the opportunity to defend herself,” one user said.
“Protect your child, but also protect the innocent,” another user wrote.
“SIL should be reported to the police for anything short of handing her child over to a predator.”