DAN WOOTTON: Royal courtiers thought the Sussexes were ‘entitled, lazy and afraid of hard work’

Spotify CEO Bill Simmons’ scathing verdict of Harry and Meghan as ‘f***ing grifters’ when the streaming giant pulled the plug on its astronomically disastrous $20 million podcast deal comes as no surprise to anyone working within the British royal family .

Although the uniquely American term, meaning one who engages in petty swindling, was never used by courtiers during the three agonizing years that the Sussexes were officially part of the monarchy, similar words were, as the pair found ways to get everyone but to blame himself. their perceived lack of success.

‘Tiled’, ‘rude’, ‘lazy’, ‘delusional’ and ‘afraid of hard work’ were some of the recurrent comments between members of the ‘Sussex Survivors Club’ as H&M searched for false reasons to be removed from public service to step. commitments they didn’t think would benefit them.

It culminated in the now-famous moment in Fiji, on a rare royal tour where real work was required on daily walks, where Meghan suggested she should be financially compensated for such hardship.

Meghan suggested that she should be financially compensated for such hardships during a trip to Fiji with Prince Harry

“I can’t believe I’m not getting paid for this,” she whined, according to noted royal author Valentine Low.

Meghan had a reputation as a diva for a long time, even appearing as a C-list actress in the moderately successful American drama Suits.

A director who worked with her on a movie once seriously told me “she was the worst actress I’ve ever had to manage,” outlining how she made a host of ridiculous and unreasonably budget-consuming trips and personal requests.

Of course, Spotify was more than happy to pay for this kind of behavior when they signed Meghan and her hapless husband Harry to such a record deal in 2020.

Unproven as broadcasters, the pair’s name was enough to polish the company’s fledgling podcast business, which has invested more than a billion dollars.

And Spotify did everything it could to make Harry and Meghan happy, capitulating when the pair began lamenting their biggest podcasting success Joe Rogan by launching a Covid-19 disinformation policy.

Which makes the complete collapse of the Sussex deal, after just 12 pathetic episodes of Meghan’s horribly awakened celebrity moan fest and a dull Christmas special, even more extraordinary.

But as any royal courtier could have warned them, no matter what Spotify did, it would never be enough.

It comes after top Spotify podcast executive Bill Simmons (pictured) called Prince Harry and Meghan Markle ‘f***ing grifters’

Meghan long had a reputation as a diva, even appearing as a C-list actress in the moderately successful American drama Suits, writes Dan Wootton. Pictured: Meghan, the Duchess of Sussex, surrounded by a female police officer and heavy-duty Fijian security guards as she visits Suva Market, Fiji, in 2018

Because making podcasts actually requires hard graft — a concept that Harry and Meghan are also allergic to.

No mine-level manual labour, but a regular dedication to researching, planning, recording and overseeing the post-production of episodes of a number of shows to build a loyal following.

For example, Rogan personally works on several episodes a week of well over an hour at a stretch.

But last year it turned out that Meghan was not even willing to interview some of her guests.

New Yorker Allison Yarrow, who appeared in the To B Or Not To B episode about the word bitch, admitted that she was interviewed by one of Meghan’s many producers, Farrah Safarfi, rather than the Duchess herself.

The fact that the failure of the deal broke out so publicly suggests that it was a total nightmare behind the scenes.

Hollywood people generally stab each other in the back and then issue press releases praising the other party for being creatively brilliant and talented; they don’t go on record attacking famous departing colleagues as the equivalent of con artists.

Last year it turned out that Meghan was not even willing to interview some of her guests. Pictured: Meghan and Harry disembark their plane upon arrival in Suva in 2018

Meghan Markle’s Spotify podcast Archetypes will not be renewed for a second season

That claim came from Bill Simmons, himself one of the world’s most famous podcasters who also serves as head of podcast innovation and monetization at Spotify.

In other words, the dude tasked with making Harry and Meghan’s deal work commercially.

Speaking on his own Spotify podcast, he said: “I wish I had been involved in the negotiations between Meghan and Harry to leave Spotify. The damn grifters. That’s the podcast we should have launched with them.’

The craziest thing to me is that Harry couldn’t even find it in himself to make a single podcast episode or series in exchange for his share of the millions pumped into his bank account.

And remember, the bar was set very low in terms of what Spotify was willing to pay.

Couldn’t the chap, who is apparently so sincere in his desire to change the world, come up with some idea of ​​content to inspire or entertain the masses?

After all, with his little black book full, the most interesting people would at least be open to his call to appear.

But Harry’s default these days is Mr. Cantankerous, as we saw loud and clear when he came under cross-examination in his Mirror phone hacking case earlier this month and couldn’t produce a shred of evidence for his costly claims, though he arrogantly said he would feel a sense of injustice if the verdict were to be against him.

Archetypes was launched last August and explores the ‘labels that try to stop women’. The Duke and Duchess reportedly signed the deal for $20 million but will not receive the full payout as it failed to meet the productivity benchmark

Meghan concluded her 12th episode in the Archetypes podcast series with a provocative poetry about survival

Furious Simmons backed that up by adding, “I have to get drunk one night and tell the story of the Zoom I had with Harry to try and help him with a podcast idea.” It’s one of my best stories. F**k them. The scammers.’

This is all catastrophic for Harry and Meghan’s waking dream of living an A-list California lifestyle like Oprah Winfrey or Ellen DeGeneres without the work both ladies do five days a week to build their fortunes .

Hollywood was open to the Duke of Delusion; somewhat taken with the idea of ​​a man willing to relinquish his birthright for a life of immense privilege to set up a fresh start for his family away from those hideous royals and the mean British tabloid media.

But Harry couldn’t understand that he wouldn’t get tens of millions of dollars just because he was a prince – that goes against the very principle of the American dream.

He failed spectacularly.

Netflix is ​​now also considering ending the deal with the Sussexes.

So while there will always be a company stupid enough to flush millions down the toilet for the first PR of a Harry and Meghan deal, the opportunity to make an impact as a pioneering content creator collaborating with streaming giants who could bringing them audiences of billions around the world has now been interrupted.

It’s a cautionary tale about why spoiled royals will always struggle to make it in the real world.