Before she died, Dame Deborah James gave her devoted husband Sebastien Bowen strict instructions – she wanted him to ‘move on’ and find love again in the years that followed.
Now, two years after Deborah’s courageous battle with bowel cancer, friends have told MailOnline her widower is finding happiness by dipping his toe into the dating scene.
Sources close to Dame Deborah’s husband say he has been on a number of dates as he tries to rebuild his life following the campaigner’s death in June 2022, after raising more than £11 million for cancer research.
A source close to the couple revealed: ‘It’s still very early days for Seb but he’s now dipping his toes back into the world of dating. That’s what Deborah would have wanted, but he takes it very slowly and is in no hurry for anything serious.
“Deborah will be hard to follow because they had a wonderful marriage and made a great couple. But Seb believes that the time has now come for him to move on, as Deborah wanted and the rest of the family supports him.’
Another friend said: ‘He’s had a few dates but they haven’t led to anything big, although I’m sure some of these women would love to have a serious relationship with him and are happy to have him back in the game.
“We’re happy for him and he feels comfortable knowing he has Deborah’s blessings.”
Pictured: Dame Deborah James and her husband Sebastien Bowen on a night out in London to celebrate their 11th wedding anniversary
Pictured: Dame Deborah with Sebastien, their two children Hugo and Eloise and the Prince of Wales in 2022
The bowel cancer campaigner told Sebastien to find love again (photo, the couple together)
Dame Deborah, best known for her BBC radio program You, Me and the Big C, bravely battled aggressive bowel cancer for five years before sadly losing her battle with the disease at the age of 40.
Before her death, she described Sébastien as a “very eligible bachelor” who was likely to attract a lot of female attention in the future.
She said: ‘I have given him strict instructions: I want him to move on. He’s a handsome man, I’m like, ‘Don’t be fooled, don’t marry a bimbo, find someone else who can make you laugh like we did.’
But she revealed that there were a few women in their lives who she feared would know about Sébastien after her death and jokingly made a list of their names so he would avoid becoming romantically involved with them .
She said: ‘I had a list of girls that I thought were going to jump my husband.
“And so I listed a few names that I said I would do my very best to come and chase after him if he hooked up with those people, which I thought was absolutely hilarious.”
Sebastien, 45, works as a banker for private equity firm Pomona Capital. He lives in a smart house in one of London’s most exclusive areas and is well known in the area.
One resident said: ‘Seb is a wonderful man, and everyone knows what a wonderful and supportive husband he was to Deborah. It’s no secret that her death hit him very hard, so it’s great that he’s getting his life back on track. He deserves all the happiness in the world.’
Sebastien grew up in London, attended the exclusive St Paul’s School and went on to study at the University of Edinburgh.
In the photo: Sebastien and Deborah with children Hugo and Eloise during a family holiday
Pictured: Dame Deborah poses for a photo in hospital with her mother Heather James
Before her death, Dame Deborah described Sebastien as a “highly eligible bachelor” who was likely to attract a lot of female attention in the future.
Pictured: Dame Deborah, bowel cancer campaigner, with her mother (centre) and daughter
The couple met in 2005 at the former London nightclub Cafe de Paris and married in France three years later.
In September 2021, they celebrated 13 years of marriage.
To commemorate their anniversary, Dame Deborah shared a heartwarming video of them dancing together in the south of France at the time, writing: ’13 years of marriage. My rock.’
The couple have two children, Hugo, 17, and Eloise, 15.
News of Sébastien’s return will also be welcomed by Dame Deborah’s mother Heather, who said in an interview on the anniversary of her daughter’s death: ‘We give Seb our blessing. We want him to move on when he feels ready.
“Deborah will be hard to follow, but he has our blessing. Because Deborah wanted him to move on, we want him to move on.”
Deborah died at her parents’ home in Woking, Surrey, where she was cared for by them in the final weeks of her life, surrounded by her loved ones, including Sebastien and their two children.
In a BBC interview last year, he opened up about the painful process of watching his wife die.
Sébastien said: ‘It was such a difficult, difficult time. It’s hard to put into words how hard it really was.”
The loving husband, 43, was thrust into the spotlight after his wife, known as Bowel Babe, began campaigning and raising money to raise awareness of bowel cancer following her own terminal diagnosis.
Dame Deborah died at her parents’ home in Woking, Surrey, where she was cared for by them in the last weeks of her life (photo, Deborah and her mother)
Sebastien Bowen is the husband of the late Dame Deborah James who died last year from bowel cancer
Bowel cancer can cause you to have blood in your stool, a change in bowel habits, or a lump in your intestine that can cause blockages. Some people also suffer from weight loss as a result of these symptoms
Sébastien said that Deborah always wanted to “look forward to something” – and that “she kept doing that until the end.”
He also spoke candidly about the fact that there was “peace” after her death.
Sébastien said: “The reality is it’s hard to say, but I think she died in probably one of the best ways you could have hoped she would die from this terrible disease.
“She died surrounded by her mother, her father, her sister, me, all of us, holding our hands… being there for her…
“It was as much as it could possibly be and it was the first time I had seen someone die, but I think there was peace in it.
“I think she’s done everything she could have hoped to achieve.”
Dame Deborah was previously deputy headteacher at Salesian College in Chertsey, Surrey, but after her bowel cancer diagnosis she documented her battle with the disease in a blog called Bowelbabe, which launched a career in journalism and made her a social media sensation .
Up to the time of her death, her Bowelbabe fund raised £11.3 million, which has since risen to £16 million.
She was made a Dame by Prince William in May 2022, just a month before her death.