IIt happened so suddenly I thought I was going crazy. I missed one meeting, and another. I kept going upstairs to do laundry and coming without coming back. I forgot what the RSPB was called, and the supposedly unforgettable date my son was born. Worst of all, words failed me. I made an appointment with the doctor and forgot to attend. When I succeeded, on the third try I dropped the routine questions and lost the word for “that thing about being able to have babies…”
“Fertility?”
“Yes that. Jesus.”
He was reassuring and discussed the options for HRT. Of course, it can be life-changing for some women. But as I considered the different estrogen patches and gels, another unease grew. Hormones or hormone-mimicking chemicals can be powerfully disruptive to the body and aquatic systems female sea snails to grow penises and the feminization of male fish. Sewage treatment is capable of removing estrogens from domestic wastewater, but that is of limited consolation given the institutional negligence of our water industry. Moreover, I swim in rivers and lakes. When I do this, it has a miraculous effect on my well-being – and that of thousands of older women. How many swims smeared with hormone gel? I hesitated. Sometimes it’s just all too complicated.
With typical discretion, my friend Maria, a collector and herbalist, provided the information that red clover flowers are full of phytoestrogens and that nettle seeds are great for hair and skin. Both plants are locally abundant; the clover is sown as a soil improver. It has almost miraculous bacterial factories in its roots that convert atmospheric nitrogen into nitrate at a rate of about 250 kg per hectare per year – an ecosystem service that significantly reduces the need for fertilizer (good news for farmers, as the price is high) . rockets).
I started making clover tea and nettle porridge every day. My biology background required me to read around as well. I discovered that the hormone stabilizing effects of red clover are thus far scientifically indistinguishable from placebo, with the familiar caveat that “more research is needed.” But a strong placebo effect is still an effect. If it helps – and in a month it seems it will – does it matter? My inspiration comes from the nearby nature; the possibility that it also gives me back the words to respond to it for free is very attractive.