Children handed smartphones to calm tantrums don’t learn how to control their emotions, new research shows

It can be all too tempting to give a restless child a phone or tablet to calm him or her down.

But if they do, they may fail to learn to control their emotions, experts warn.

During their first years of life, children learn a lot about self-regulation – how to respond to certain situations.

It can give them the ability to react calmly rather than angrily in frustrating or stressful situations, and it helps them learn how to get along with others and become independent.

In recent years, however, it has become more common to give children digital devices when their emotions become overwhelming.

And researchers have found that this can have harmful long-term consequences.

A team from Eötvös Loránd University in Hungary asked 265 parents to complete questionnaires about their child’s behavior.

Their children were on average 3.5 years old and a follow-up questionnaire took place a year later.

Analysis found that the more parents used phones or tablets as a calming tool, the worse their children were at managing anger and frustration a year later.

Dr. Veronika Konok, the first author of the study, said: ‘Here we show that if parents regularly offer their child a digital device to calm them down or stop a tantrum, the child will not learn to regulate their emotions.

‘This leads to more serious problems with emotion regulation, especially problems with anger management, later in life.

“Tanter tantrums cannot be cured by digital devices. Children need to learn how to deal with their negative emotions themselves.

“They need their parents’ help during this learning process, not the help of a digital device.”

The findings, published in the journal Frontiers in Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, also revealed that children with poorer basic anger management skills were more likely to be given digital devices.

“It is not surprising that parents are more likely to use digital emotion regulation when their child has problems with emotion regulation,” says Dr. Konok.

‘But our results highlight that this strategy can lead to the escalation of a pre-existing problem.’

The team said it is important not to avoid situations that could be frustrating for the child.

Instead, it is recommended that parents coach their children through difficult situations, help them recognize their emotions and teach them how to deal with them.”

They suggested that health professionals who work with families could provide information on how parents can help their children manage their emotions without giving them tablets or smartphones.

Professor Caroline Fitzpatrick, researcher at Université de Sherbrooke in Quebec and senior author of the study, said: ‘Based on our results, new training and counseling methods for parents can be developed.

‘As people’s awareness that digital devices are inappropriate tools for curing tantrums increases, children’s mental health and wellbeing will benefit.’