Can an affair IMPROVE a marriage? Fiery debate breaks out on GMB as psychotherapist says infidelity can be helpful to ‘rebuild something stronger’
Good Morning Britain hosted a passionate debate today after a psychotherapist suggested that an affair could actually improve a marriage in some cases.
Psychotherapist Lucy Beresford said that “infidelity can help rebuild something stronger,” but author and podcaster Sara Davison fired back during the discussion, telling her that “cheating is just not acceptable.”
The debate comes after a survey by dating site Illicit Encounters found that 72 percent of romance fraudsters said their marriages “improved dramatically” after having an affair.
Speaking to presenters Ben Shephard and Kate Garraway, Lucy said: “People always say to me ‘should I stay or should I go?'” but said couples should consider whether they can “build something better, where our needs are met.” met. where I feel valued and can actually grow as a healthy person.’
Sara argued, “We have to be honest: Betrayal isn’t sexy, lies aren’t attractive, and cheating is just not acceptable, so it’s hardly a recipe for a healthy relationship.”
The podcaster admitted she was shocked by the survey results.
She said: ‘I find it baffling how people can say it has improved their relationship when in reality they are cheating on their partner without even knowing it.
“So yes, their sex life may have improved, but not the quality and prospects for their relationship.”
Sharing her own experiences, she said: ‘Because I’ve been on the receiving end of betrayal, and that’s why I started helping people deal with things like this, the bubble doesn’t last long and living with guilt can have a big impact to have. very negative impact on the relationship.’
Davison added: ‘If your partner eventually finds out, because in many cases they do, the devastation it causes even to the children, the family unit and friendship groups.
“It’s called divorce contagion, which means that if you get divorced, other couples in your friendship group are more likely to get divorced too.”
However, Lucy argued that infidelity could be an opportunity for the couple to build a stronger relationship that meets their needs.
Psychotherapist Lucy Beresford (right) said that ‘infidelity can help ‘build something stronger’, while author and podcaster Sara Davison (left) ‘cheating is simply not acceptable’
The podcaster admitted she was shocked by the study’s results because there is no way cheating can improve a relationship
The novelist said: ‘The opposite of that is that some people surveyed say that it allows them to show up in their relationship as a better partner or as a better parent because there is less resentment and fewer things that make you feel can feel really unhappy. you can feel miserable about that.
“When infidelity is discovered, there is definitely a huge moment for a crisis, we feel like we will never be able to survive, but a couple creates the couple.
“Even though your partner created 99 percent of the mess you’re wading through right now, there’s still one percent left for you to think, ‘How did I show up in this relationship, am I happy?’
Viewers rushed to the comments to leave their own thoughts, with many saying cheating ruins relationships
“What happens is the traitor says I was feeling pretty miserable. Affairs isn’t just about sex, it’s about getting your emotional needs met… it can open the door to discussing the issues and rebuilding something stronger.”
Viewers rushed to the comments to leave their own thoughts, with many saying cheating ruins relationships.
One person said: ‘All the couples I know where someone has cheated have all ended up alone, divorced, depressed and regretting it. It ruins relationships, but doesn’t improve them.’
Another said: ‘No. Most people I know have broken up after one of them cheated. Of those who have not, they are either together for the sake of their children, or the one who has not cheated blames himself and is deceived by the manipulative deceiver and believes their lies.”
Someone else said: ‘Jesus no, the trust would be broken, once the trust is gone so is the relationship.’
While someone else joked: ‘It improved me a lot, I found out he was cheating so I divorced him.’