BRYONY GORDON: OnlyFans stars Lily Phillips and Bonnie Blue have been inundated with vile abuse after sleeping with hundreds of men – but THESE are the people we should really be calling out

I woke up the other day and thought about Bonnie Blue. This may surprise you, as I am a 44 year old perimenopausal and have a husband.

Not exactly the target group of the OnlyFans star, who made headlines earlier this year by trying to have sex with as many 18-year-old boys as possible.

The so-called ‘adult content creator’ slept with hundreds of teenagers during Nottingham Trent University Freshers’ Week. She filmed the encounters and then posted the footage to her OnlyFans account, which apparently made her a millionaire.

The reason I thought about her is because I have a terribly unhealthy habit – no, not that kind. It means that I immediately grab my phone and scroll through Instagram as soon as the alarm goes off. And while my feed normally gave me nothing riskier than ads for electric toothbrushes, that morning it yielded the remarkable news that a post I’d made about body positivity had been especially liked by Bonnie.

I clicked on the handle to check if it was really her – and lo and behold, there was the 25-year-old from Derbyshire, in various states of undress, teasing her 195,000 Instagram followers with the very real possibility of sex.

I’m not prudish. On my own Instagram I often see that I wear little more than Bonnie – but as a size 18 mother who wants to make women feel better about themselves, my motivation is slightly different.

In the post she liked, I did indeed walk 10km around London in my underwear. I wasn’t trying to look sexy, quite the opposite. I tried to show what raw, unfiltered bodies look like in the wild, and make the point that women don’t exist solely to arouse members of the opposite sex.

So it felt ironic that Bonnie liked it. But what bothered me more was the day-long spiral I found myself in, trying to figure out what could possibly motivate her to do what she does, other than money. If she really loved sex, as she claims, why was she wasting her time sleeping with a bunch of ignorant 18 year olds, who were there to satisfy their own needs and not hers?

Some are calling her “predatory,” arguing that 18-year-olds don’t think about the consequences of having sex on videos that will remain online forever.

More depressing is the realization that Bonnie is hardly exceptional in the world of OnlyFans, with an equally sweet-looking girl also from Derbyshire, Lily Phillips, being interviewed in this newspaper this weekend about her New Year’s resolution to meet 1,000 men in 24 years to go to bed. o’clock. Like Bonnie, Lily claims she loves her job. But a YouTube documentary released this week showed a very different reality, with the 23-year-old crying after an ‘intense’ 14-hour sex session with 101 different men.

And yet, the more I tried to wrap my head around this new generation of so-called influencers, the more I realized I was part of the problem. Why didn’t I call out the creeps lining up around the block to sleep with them, the hundreds of guys lining up like they were waiting to get their hands on the latest PlayStation?

Because these ‘events’ are likely to be attended by many men, unlike the odd ‘wrong’ un in a Macintosh. They’re full of ‘normal’ guys, happy, proud even, to appear on social media, camping out with lawn chairs, like day trippers trying to get last-minute tickets to Wimbledon.

It would be almost laughable if there were no real consequences to this. Next week, the fifty ‘ordinary’ men accused of the mass rape of Gisele Pelicot will be convicted by a French court. Their identities are so mundane – firefighters, soldiers, journalists, loving grandfathers – that the press calls them Monsieur-Tout-Le-Monde (Mr. Everyman). Things are now so bad in Britain that the government’s former extremist tsar warned this week that misogynist Andrew Tate is viewed favorably by almost half of young men.

Dame Sara Khan said the rise of influencers such as Tate – who are awaiting trial on human trafficking and rape charges – was fueling the “growing normalization of harmful attitudes towards women among young men, particularly within schools”.

Her warning came after the Council of National Police Chiefs issued a statement last summer saying online misogyny was fueling a “national emergency” of violence against women and girls. The report shows that perpetrators are getting younger, with the average age of a suspect now being 15. “We know that the influencers, Andrew Tate, the influencing element of boys in particular is quite terrifying,” said Deputy Chief Constable Maggie Blyth.

And yet, very few men still seem to denounce this heinous behavior. It is female commentators who must point out the urgency of the situation.

It is Bonnie Blue and Lily Phillips who are attacked, tricked and threatened with death, while the boys, who line up to be with them for two minutes, remain anonymous.

I may not agree with what these OnlyFans models are doing, but the fact that the men are going free says everything you need to know about the society we live in.

There is, as far as I can see, no anti-Andrew Tate, no grown man standing up and telling his millions of followers that it is possible—desirable, even—to treat women with respect. When blokes come in, it’s inevitable to defend a friend who they think has fallen victim to a witch hunt – see chef Ainsley Harriott describe Gregg Wallace this week as ‘fantastic’ to work with, with his experience clearly negates that of the many women who did so. have accused the former MasterChef presenter of sexual misconduct.

Where are the guys who speak out against this kind of behavior? Where are the fathers who lead protests to save both their sons and their daughters? I know there are tons of good men out there, but they let the side down. When I asked a friend why he didn’t say anything, he said he didn’t feel comfortable lecturing women. But that answer was significant because it is the men and boys we need to talk to, not the women and girls.

The more I think about it, the more I understand why Bonnie Blue would like a post about women being able to exist in their bodies without judgment. Like so many of us, she must be tired of being held responsible for the behavior of men who are perfectly capable of taking responsibility for themselves.

Phew! I didn’t get caught at the Feather Ball

I hope you’re all having a good time cringing at the beautiful photos of David Cameron and Tom Parker Bowles attending the Feathers Ball for teenagers in the 1980s.

Luckily, no snapper caught me in the early 1990s when I visited one at the Hammersmith Palais in London, although I can assure you there was just as much chain-smoking and kissing going on. A reminder, as I panic over my own daughter becoming a teenager, that the teenage years have always been about breaking rules.

In a damning report, the Women and Equality Commission has found that there is widespread ‘medical misogyny’ within the NHS. It’s nice to finally have an official statement from those in power about something most women have known for years.

Kate sets the alarm bells ringing

Kate Moss is said to have split from her boyfriend, Count Nikolai von Bismarck, because she wants to ‘have fun’ in the run-up to Christmas, while he has chosen a more sober path.

It sets off all my alarm bells and reminds me of something Busted guitarist Matt Willis told me last week during a live recording of my podcast, The Life Of Bryony.

Like me, Matt is down to earth – and happy to have ‘swapped the fast lane for the bus lane’. It’s advice Mossy could do with listening as she approaches her 51st birthday in January.

My bedtime starts at 8 p.m

According to data analyzed by Virgin Media 02, Britons went to bed much earlier and got up much earlier in 2024 than in previous years. The average time for network traffic to drop was 9:20 p.m., a full 20 minutes earlier than in 2020. But that’s a good 80 minutes later than I start my ridiculously long bedtime routine, ensuring I’m in a deep sleep by 10 p.m. sleep lie. Bliss!

Trust clinic

How do you enjoy a Christmas party without drinking? It’s one I’ve struggled with over the years. I’ve found that my best tip is to enjoy the fact that you’re not the subject of office gossip the next day. That, and wear a large pair of dazzling earrings to distract from the glass of water in your hands!