My two sons, ages eighteen and eighteen, are bright and brilliant. Like so many young people, they believe that they are invincible, that they can do anything.
I hope they feel like this for as long as possible. Because, like me, they are dyslexic, a condition that can sometimes make you feel stupid and useless. At school, my nickname was Special Needs.
Mocked for my specially prescribed pink ‘hippy’ glasses, frequent misspellings, and misreading often made me the butt of the joke.
I still remember blushing to my toes after I mistakenly asked my science teacher about orgasms, instead of organisms.
Dyslexia also wreaked havoc on programming as, like many dyslexics, I can have a hard time reading analog clocks. It took me much longer than my classmates to learn to tell time.
Luckily, I became a fast runner, the teachers described me as a blonde streak through the halls, sprinting everywhere, just in case I misread the time.
My children, like me, are dyslexic, a condition that can sometimes make you feel stupid and useless. In school, my nickname was Special Needs.
However, while dyslexia has made my life more complicated and humiliating me at times, it has also given me determination. It has taught me to check, double check, and double check my work and my schedule.
I insisted that my dyslexia would not be a reason for failing, not being prepared or being late, that I would not always be seen as the ‘dummy’ who needed extra time in everyday life as well as in the exam room.
But I’m afraid this is exactly the negative view that has been given credence by the outcome, delivered this week, of a discrimination lawsuit brought by a dyslexic security guard against his employer.
Raymond Bryce, from Stafford, West Midlands, has accused his boss of discrimination for sacking him over serial delays. He said his condition meant he would “be late for his own funeral” and that his managers should give him a “15 to 20 minute leeway” to his official start time. The judge ruled in his favor.
It’s ridiculous. Does Mr. Bryce ask for the same considerations when taking a plane, advising the airline that his condition could delay him 20 minutes, so please can he wait for the flight? Should theaters wait for dyslexic audiences to arrive before starting the movie? Should hospitals delay operations for dyslexic surgeons?
Of course not. Being punctual is about respecting those around you.
Mocked for my specially prescribed pink ‘hippy’ glasses, my frequent misspellings and misreadings often made me the butt of the joke.
Because, no matter who you are, you can’t expect your employers, or your life, to expect you. Doing so would be rude, which has nothing to do with being dyslexic.
Today, I spend hours preparing myself, my belongings and my poor beleaguered family to always be on time. To leave home in the morning, everything has to be prepared the night before.
I set alarms on my phone to help get the kids dressed and ready for school. Timers are set while cooking. I keep reminders for tasks, medications, and appointments.
Now, my family may find these behaviors amusing, but I have learned the hard way what can happen if I don’t follow them. As a child, I found out that being late for drama club meant getting kicked out of the play, and likewise, as an adult, I would have lost many jobs in my TV hosting career if I hadn’t been on time.
However, in my late teens and early 20s, my eagerness to instantly respond to my boyfriends’ texts made it seem unattainably unattainable. And even though I tried to be the traditional late bride on my wedding day, I was sweating from stress and nearly ran down the aisle.
Now I’m limping with a broken metatarsal in a noisy surgical boot, but that means I leave double the time to get anywhere.
Because, whether it’s dyslexia or a broken foot, I don’t think anyone should feel like it’s ‘allowed’ to be rude, and it’s not the message I want my kids to get.
I want to teach them strategies to succeed despite their dyslexia, instead of giving them (or anyone else) the message that it’s an excuse to fail.