At war with my own skin: my life with eczema – and how I found the key to keeping it away

HHow do you scratch an itch under your skin? The truth is you can’t. When I was fifteen, I looked at my hands and saw bubbles forming under the skin of my hands, which became fluid-filled blisters that hurt and itched until they burst. Grim, I know – and it didn’t get better as she healed; peeling off the bandages to change them was agony, while the clammy cold of the compress treatments are etched in my memory. Plus, my now gauze-covered fingers were just the kicker my teenage gut didn’t need.

My eczema, which in the most basic terms is a skin barrier defect due to genetics and environmental factors, started at the age of four. Then it was more brash. I wondered why it bothered me, and no one else seemed to. Children asked what it was, usually with mild disgust, which only made me feel ashamed. However, I had one ace up my sleeve: my father was a dermatologist. “We tried everything to cure and control it, but the only major difference I saw was after rounds of homeopathy,” he recalls, after it was recommended by an old medical friend of his. And it worked; until I reached my teens.

I’ve never done that since not had eczema, even if it was just a small spot; but it also behaved very differently each time it flared up. I started with more rashes atopic eczema, while the ultra-itchy discoid eczema has also come and gone. Contact dermatitis, which I’ve also had, occurs when the body touches a certain substance (nickel for me – I paint clear nail polish on the metal buttons of my jeans so it doesn’t touch my skin), and I have red , flaky seborrheic eczema on my scalp and eyebrows. That terrible blistering eczema from my teenage years is dyshidrotic eczema (or pompholyx). So far there are no signs of varicose veins, which often affects the lower legs, but I’m never one to do things half-heartedly, so give it time.

Over there does not appear to be a cure. I’m told it’s just a matter of control, which feels unfair, especially when it seems to affect children more – 1 in 5 children and 1 in 10 adults in Britain suffer from eczema due to a combination of our “naïve childhood immune system, sensitive skin barrier and exposure to potential environmental factors,” says Dr. Derrick Phillips, dermatologist at Montrose London tells me.

Studies have shown that women are more likely to get it, as do those with a family history or who also have hay fever and asthma. Interestingly, US research has found that the ethnic groups most affected are Native Americans, Pacific Islanders and Asians, followed by whites, and that black people are the least likely to suffer. Other studies show that people in high-income regions, or those in higher social and economic classes, are more prone to eczema – both attributed to environmental problems such as car pollution. Anecdotally, I realized that my ADHD medication – while helpful for my focus – was also fueling my anxiety (and research has shown a link between ADHD and eczema). in children.)

My most recent and ongoing flare-up started in 2020 when I was working on my proposal for my book, Ugly. The stress of writing it caused a flare-up in my face and body, but I thought it would go away once I signed the book deal. Instead, it seemed to get worse. The timing was terrible; at the time I was regularly on TV trying to give jovial beauty advice with my face in weeping, peeling pain. At night my body was so raw that I slathered myself in multiple creams and wore a onesie because the waistband and buttons of pajamas hurt my skin.

“It doesn’t look that bad, it’s not that red,” a harried GP told me during my eight-minute appointment, despite telling them about the above. But the truth is, if I had been white, 70% of my body would have been bright red; it was a stark reminder, just as in other areas of healthcare, the needs and disparities of people of color are so rarely considered.

Ultimately, I sought specialist help. The dermatologist was shocked that I had ‘put up with’ my eczema for so long. After two courses of oral steroids, topical steroid creams, Milton bleach baths (used to help reduce itching and reduce the growth of bacteria), the symptoms subsided briefly, then returned.

Having eczema and working in the beauty industry has been a rollercoaster. I’ve often struggled with posting on social media, where your face is often your currency; Doing a makeup tutorial with half my face peeling off feels the opposite of inspiring. But I tried to do it anyway, to challenge the idea that we have to look perfect to be of value in the world.

When my eczema flared up again in 2020, some of the suggested steps were: phototherapya UV light therapy that requires weekly treatments for a few months, or medications that control inflammation by suppressing the immune system, such as cyclosporine or methotrexateneither of which I wanted to try, especially during the pandemic.

It’s been a matter of trial and error. Besides powerful topical steroid creams, I have removed most of them scents from my laundry detergent and shower gels to minimize irritation. When my skin gets irritated, I use the gentle Avène Tolerance range. I used to have to apply heavy moisturizers and oils twice a day, but the ceramides are in there CeraVe moisturizer have made a huge difference. I now use it once a day.

I also realized that even though I had been fine with it before, dairy and gluten now seem to cause a flare-up. “The unpredictability of eczema is a real challenge: it can be difficult to pinpoint the triggers. Although food is unlikely to be the cause of eczema, food allergies can make eczema worse. We now also understand that the gut microbiome can influence eczema,” says Dr. Thivi Maruthappu, dermatologist and author of Skin food. “People with eczema can also have low vitamin D levels and this appears to contribute to more severe skin inflammation. It is therefore important that you take vitamin D supplements during the winter months.” She also recommends omega-3 if you’re not getting enough in your diet.

Traditional Chinese medicine practitioner Dr. Mazin Al-Khafaji, founder of Dermatology M, specializes in customized skin treatment using herbs, topical products and acupuncture. “There’s no doubt that people with atopic eczema have a disrupted skin barrier, but that’s not the end of the story. Topical and systemic use of steroids actually only targets the acute phase of the inflammatory process. In contrast, Chinese medicine is able to very successfully treat the inflammatory stages to suppress eczema and more.”

Now my eczema is largely under control, but I have been looking for triggers to prevent further flare-ups. The common thread for me seems to be stress; my first periods coincided with starting a new school, others coincided with busy moments in my life, so I’ve made serious lifestyle changes, namely meditation and slower, mindful movements like yoga – although that’s still a work in progress implementation.

There have been other unexpected downsides, including thinning of my skin in some areas from the steroid creams: “There has been an explosion of eczema treatments in the last five years,” says Dr. Phillips, citing the oral treatments dupilumab and JAK inhibitors plus tralokinumab injections all aimed at the internal treatment of eczema, “and there are more new treatments in the pipeline.”

That’s why I try to prioritize stress management above all. “The kind of pill you really need is a cooling pill,” my father adds. Reluctantly, I think he’s right.