ALEXANDRA SHULMAN’S NOTEBOOK: The perils of making your child’s life too perfect

We live in Nappy Valley Central. The local streets are full of strollers, dads with papoose and toddlers on scooters.

Their parents look at them with delight, pick them up when they fall or comfort them when another child in the park picks up their ball.

These children are similarly enchanted by their parents; their world is made right by a wave of the hand and a hug.

For now, these parents’ main concerns are childcare and sleepless nights. But when I look at these families, I often think they don’t know what’s coming down the pike.

A generation of young people are now immersed in an epidemic of anxiety and other mental illnesses, while a third claim to have experienced some form of disorder.

For those parents who could once soothe with a kiss, there isn’t much worse than seeing your child suffer like this, sometimes unable to get out of bed, often unable to hold down a job, seemingly unable to cope with life. to go.

They have been titled Generation Sicknote in response to recently released figures on the number of 18 to 24 year olds who are unable to work due to their mental health.

But is much of this problem the parents’ fault? Has our attitude towards parenting not made it robust enough to deal with the real world?

The children of many of my contemporaries have had these kinds of problems – and very often the parents are the most devoted, wanting only to provide the very best care for their beloved offspring and to solve their problems.

I’m not immune. Even now, when I hear from my 28-year-old son that he has a dilemma, my immediate reaction is that I think I should be able to solve it. To be clear, he’s not asking me that: it’s my knee-jerk reaction.

That is the general attitude of many of us towards our children. If they only interacted academically at school, additional tutoring would be required.

School holidays were filled with trips and activities so they were never just hanging out. Their faddy food was taken into account. And once they got out of school, the Bank of Mom and Dad was open. In short, we have done everything we can to make their lives as easy as possible.

But by isolating them early on from the fact that life is hard and that ultimately everyone must take responsibility for themselves, we may have deprived them of some important survival skills during their formative years.

Since the world is an uncertain place, with no guarantees of safety, I would warn some parents in the park that they should not find it useful to make their children’s little world perfect as often as possible. They may be much happier in the long run.

A duo to tame the hardest of hearts

The resonance of Netflix’s One Day was quite extraordinary.

The series, led by the charismatic Leo Woodall and Ambika Mod, has struck a chord that neither the original book nor any subsequent film has. It has made so many viewers look at our own lives through the filter of Em and Dex’s story.

The duo’s path – littered with excruciating missed opportunities, bad relationships and unspoken thoughts – has made even those of us decades older than the on-screen couple identify with them.

Yes, there’s the nostalgic recognition of landlines, the soundtrack (who doesn’t remember Joan Armatrading’s bed blues or Blur’s Britpop sound) and the nineties clothing, but it’s something different than that.

It’s something that has caused 50-year-old men to leave the room because they can’t bear the coming tragedy, and couples – who rarely agree on what to watch – to binge all fourteen episodes in a weekend.

I can’t identify what that thing is. But I do know that it has shown that even the most cynical and brutal viewers have a part of themselves affected by this romance in ways they didn’t expect.

Brave Yulia joins the super troupers

The women have it.

Not only does our excellent Queen Camilla have to pop up everywhere in her husband’s absence to reassure us that we still have a working monarchy, but last week Volodymyr Zelensky’s glamorous wife, Olena Zelenska, arrived in Britain to celebrate the second event. commemorate. anniversary of the outbreak of war in Ukraine.

Both women are troupers who probably never dreamed they would find themselves in the demanding positions they now hold.

They are joined by a third party whose stoicism in the face of tragedy is utterly remarkable.

Yulia Navalnaya, the widow of Russian opposition leader Alexei Navalny, has immediately taken over from her husband following his recent suspicious death in a Siberian prison following years of brutality.

She could be forgiven if she simply wanted to disappear from the spotlight herself, but Yulia has continued to fight for her husband’s corner, never less than flawless in front of the cameras and demonstrating that no matter what Putin does, the Navalny name will live on . .

Everyone stands up… for the stately house soufflé

Talter magazine has it right with this issue’s Country House Awards.

The film Saltburn has revealed a new fascination with stately stacks, and in a world dominated by grim headlines, it’s perfect escapism to reflect on some of the categories: Best Elves at Drayton House in Northamptonshire, Best Temple at Castle Howard.

My favorite entry, however, is Best Cheese Soufflé, apparently served at Broadspear in Hampshire by Harry and Clodagh Herbert. Who knows?

Last call – install the gate louses now!

Air travel is stressful enough without those passengers queuing at the departure gate ages before boarding is called, jostling for a spot with their carry-on luggage. Now I’ve discovered that airline staff have a name for them: gate lice. Heaven. There’s nothing like a pejorative term to make someone feel better about things.