A list of stupid names for the Switch 2

Nintendo’s next console is just around the corner – ish? The next version of Mario gaming hardware, dubbed the ‘Switch 2’ by people used to Sony unimaginatively adding numbers to the PlayStation end, will reportedly arrive in 2025, following a shift in launch window. The delay leaves those who have never delved into Nintendo’s current-gen catalog with a tough decision: buy a Switch now or wait for a Switch 2, when it actually hits shelves? Backward compatibility remains an unknown and not one of Nintendo’s historic achievements.

But as players who have long been glued to the drift-prone hybrid handheld, we have other questions on our minds. Most importantly, what does Nintendo even call this thing?

Nintendo is not a company that repeats the same concept over and over again. It loves a gimmick, and those hard evasions have led directly to naming inspiration. A new gaming console that’s a cube? GameCUBE it is. A portable with a double screen? Easy: Nintendo DS. Even 3DS and Wii U put a spin on household names based on new technology. Unless Switch 2 is a true successor console like Super Nintendo – and the original Switch is perhaps perfect enough to demand such brand loyalty – the device’s name remains basically unpredictable.

With that in mind, instead of trying to guess what out-of-left-field name Nintendo could pull out hat Cappy, we here at Polygon found ourselves spouting off everything the company almost certainly won’t call the Switch 2. Below, we humbly submit a list of terrible next-gen console names for this coveted 2025 release. If any of these are the real name of the console, the good news is that Nintendo has time to do even better.

Name suggestions for Bad Switch 2:

To expand

2witch

Schakel (pronounced: Sweetch)

Swiiitch (pronounced: Sweeeeeetch)

Exchange

Switch RT

Super switch**

Super Switch Turbo**

Exchange

New Nintendo Switch console

Nintendo change

Nintendo click

Nintendo Stream

Nintendo Labwotch, the all-cardboard handheld

Switch XXL

Switch+

Also switch

Nintendo too

SwitcherToo

Nintendo2?

Game friend

Small

4DS

GameRectangle

NintendoGo

The Nintendo Entertainment Switch

**These are actually good ideas