I altered my friend’s bridal gown before realising she’d borrowed it – now the original owner is threatening to sue me

A woman has revealed how she altered a wedding dress for her friend as a favor – but now she’s being sued for ‘ruining’ the dress.

Speaking to British parenting platform Mumsnet, the anonymous woman explained that she was contacted ‘out of the blue’ by an old friend to alter the dress, as the bride-to-be didn’t have time to take it to a professional seamstress.

The woman hesitantly agreed, but revealed she didn’t charge for the job because it was “a favor” to help the bride at the last minute.

However, the woman who lent the dress to the bride sent her a message threatening to sue, saying that she “ruined” her dress by having it altered, and that now she “couldn’t” to use’.

Many forum users rushed to comment, saying the original owner of the dress was “ridiculous.”

On the British parenting platform, the woman explained that she was contacted “out of the blue” by an old friend to alter a wedding dress because she didn’t have time to take it to a professional seamstress.

The message read: ‘I have a “friend” who hasn’t seen her in a few years, we’ve grown apart. Her wedding has been canceled twice, once due to Covid and once due to the sudden death of her mother.

‘Her original dress is too big now that she has lost a lot of weight. She contacted me out of the blue to ask if I wanted to take her new dress because she didn’t have time to find a seamstress because they were eloping.

‘I make my own clothes, so it’s something I can do. I said yes if you’re in trouble. So she took me [the] dress, said it was her other friend’s and that it should be next[ing] upwards.

‘When she tried it, a few other minor things needed to be fixed on the poor construction.

‘I cut 7 inches off the dress and hemmed it (4 layers) and spent forever undoing the back seam and straightening it out. Then, as requested, I made a waistband from the hem.”

The poster continued, “She picked up the dress two weeks ago. I did this as a favor so that no money or anything else changed hands.

‘The bride’s other friend contacted me on Facebook and said I had ruined her dress. She said she went to a lawyer because it was broken and she couldn’t use it anymore (it’s a wedding dress made of fairly cheap fabric and wouldn’t have cost much to begin with and was poorly constructed). When I returned it it was in better condition than what I received.

“Can she sue me for doing this? As far as I knew, it was the bride’s job to do with it as she pleased. I messaged the bride but she didn’t reply.’

Many rushed to the comments saying that the bride’s friend was “ridiculous” and has watched a lot of American legal dramas

Many suggested the bride’s friend is “ridiculous,” saying she can’t actually file a lawsuit because there was no contract or money involved.

One person said: ‘There is no contract, no money has changed hands. I bet they just want to cheat you out of some money.”

Another said: ‘Of course she can’t. She’s being ridiculous.’ Another added: “Lol tell her even half an hour of lawyer time will cost her more than her dress in the first place.”

A fourth said: ‘She’s been watching way too much American TV. You can’t sue someone just because you’re not happy with something.

“You don’t have a contractual relationship with her and you didn’t steal the dress from her, so she can’t sue you, so rest assured and block her.”

However, others suggested that the issue of clothing ownership should lie with the bride and not the woman who made the alterations.

One person wrote: ‘No good deed goes unpunished! The dress owner’s problem lies with the bride. She was a real CF if she had subtracted 7 inches from the length and made various other changes to a friend’s dress without permission.”

Another said: ‘Clearly the bride didn’t tell the friend she was having it adjusted and now the friend is upset it’s too short for her.

‘This is a miscommunication on their part. The friend should have told the bride that she wanted the dress back, the bride should have told the friend that it was too long and that it needed to be adjusted. Not your problem at all!

Someone else added: ‘Not your problem. You acted in good faith for a friend. I don’t think there is any reason to sue you. This is between the two others. Keep your messages safe. Print a copy.

“Maybe a response that says, ‘This matter is between you and I’m not going to talk about this any further.” Then block.’

Meanwhile, a fourth person agreed: ‘The ‘friend’ needs to discuss it with the bride who asked someone to alter the dress for her. Not your problem; you weren’t supposed to know.’

A number of commenters suggested that the issue of dress ownership should be with the bride and not the woman who made the alterations

“Make sure you take screenshots of your conversations with the bride, in case they disappear.”

However, others suggested that the woman was wrong for altering the dress without the owner’s permission.

One person said: ‘You knew the dress wasn’t your girlfriend’s so you shouldn’t have altered it without the owner’s permission.

“I’m surprised you agreed to it because I wouldn’t want to be responsible for potentially ruining a wedding dress!” However, the fact that you had to cut 19cm off indicates that the owner is considerably taller than the person she lent it to, and must have realized that it needed to be adjusted to fit, otherwise it would drag across the floor and look rubbish.

‘Most wedding dresses need to be altered in some way to fit the wearer. That is why they are not really suitable for lending. The moral of the story is: don’t lend out your valuables.’

Another agreed: ‘The bride told you the dress belonged to someone else. I therefore would not have made any permanent changes without explicit permission from both the bride and the owner – raise the hem and add seams that could be removed, but not cut.

“However, the legal waters for deciding who is responsible for the damage look decidedly muddy and I doubt it would be worth filing a lawsuit.”

The original poster added: “I just want to add something. The dress is perfect. It is in better condition now than when I got it. It seems the owner’s problem is that I shortened it to fit the bride. The owner is slightly taller.

‘Thank you all. I have a series of texts from the bride in which she explains what she needs and why she asks me (that she does not have time to go to a professional)

‘It also shows that I said I would rather not do that because I am not a professional. Then I say I’ll do it as a favor, but I don’t want payment because I’m not a professional. (I already have a paid job and I don’t need to muddy the tax waters by also taking on sewing jobs.

‘I have two messages from her saying that the dress now fits her better than ever and that it even fits her body better.

“I didn’t reply to the owner of the dress, but I messaged the bride on every platform I have for her. I’m keeping all the evidence I have just in case, but thanks for putting my mind at ease.”

Some suggested that the woman was wrong for altering the dress without the owner’s permission

The woman later shared a new message she received from the angry bride. It read: ‘I was so shocked that you cut off so much of the bottom!! Who even does that? All you had to do was fold the hem a little and put a stitch on it.

“It didn’t matter if it dragged a little bit. I didn’t ask you to fix the back seam, you did that to make yourself look good.

‘I wear a cardigan so that no one sees it. Xxxxx is p******( on me now, so I had to tell her you did it, not me. She can fight you about it. I have enough on my plate with the elopement.”

The original poster added: “I’m at a loss for words. When she picked up the dress she was thrilled that it fit her so well, and she said herself that the little sash I made from the hem really completed the dull waist!

“I’ve blocked them both and I’m going to put this down to experience. I’m ashamed that I’m falling for a sob story. No wonder people don’t help each other anymore. I hope someone tells her that wedding dresses don’t have folded hems. Arrrggghhhh. I’m so annoyed!’