My new enemy in the video game world is the horrible Stalker from Helldivers 2

I like to think that I am a very patient person, who can face any challenge in life with a smile on my face. I am well-mannered, polite and forgiving. But there is one thing that always makes me furious, turning me into a raging and incoherent fool. That would be one of the most annoying video game enemies of all time: the Stalker of Helldivers 2a bug that somehow feels like it’s targeting me specifically, because of some deep personal grudge.

Helldivers 2 Developer Arrowhead has a lot of unexpected surprises up its sleeve, like a suicide mission to a bug-infested planet that ripped open a black hole, and a shocking Automaton counter-invasion days after we thought we’d wiped the bots off the map. All of this is child’s play compared to the Stalker, a foe that disguises itself, waits to pounce, and then snipes at you with its flickering tongue and slashing claws.

Initially, Stalkers were stealthy, but not fully camouflaged; they had a shimmering effect that allowed players to see their outline from a distance, especially during weather effects like fog. Towards the end of April, Arrowhead changed this, making Stalkers truly stealthy. It’s possible to catch a glimpse of a little shimmer if the conditions are perfect, but realistically you’ll probably get caught and then given a good beating.

It’s gotten to the point where when I play against Terminid, I center my entire strategy around these hateful little beasts. I use the guard dog backpack to fry sneaky Stalkers. I roll with a grenade launcher, and as soon as I get a whiff of Stalkers, I start tracking down their nests so I can pelt them with grenades. If I don’t feel safe and secure, why should they?

You would expect that as time goes by… more prepared to deal with Stalkers. You’d be wrong! I’m comfortable with a Bile Titan, and I’ve dealt with half a dozen Chargers without breaking a sweat. I actually enjoy fighting Automatons, even though many players consider them the scarier faction.

But to fuck Stalkers. All my homies hate Stalkers. I will never forget the humiliating experience of walking in to play a mid-level game as a two-man team with a buddy of mine, only to watch ourselves air hockey back and forth like the saddest puck between an endless stream of Stalkers.

There are ways to deal with these guys – shotguns, careful headshots, certain strategies – but months after the birth of Helldivers 2those are the only things that really make me angry. Time hasn’t healed that wound at all. That’s an achievement, I guess, so congrats to the Stalker for claiming his place as one of the most annoying video game enemies of all time.