Our Secret Spot Sydney: Swinging couple say sleeping with other people IMPROVES their relationship

A couple has revealed how ‘swinging’ has made their relationship stronger than ever – as long as they always do it together and don’t stray apart from each other.

Sex club owner Jess, 30, and event planner Jay, 46, said: Kyle and Jackie O they met “the traditional way, on Tinder” two years ago and started dating shortly after.

At the time, Jess was still with her ex-fiancé, Lawrence, who is still her business partner at… Our secret place at Annandale in Sydney.

Jess, pictured, was in an open relationship when she met Jay – he is now her only partner but the two rock and always do it together

As things developed between Jess and Jay, an event planner, they decided to “end” their relationship for a bit, excluding other partners.

To make up for the lack of sexual diversity, Jess, who’s been bisexual for a decade, suggested we swing into non-monogamous relationships.

“I’m quite open to things, so when she brought it up I thought it was worth a try,” Jay said.

The first time they ‘tried’ it was also Jay’s very first ‘group sex experience’.

“We had a quartet with my best friend and her partner,” Jess explained.

Jay likes open communication in his relationships and says the swinging lifestyle really works for him as the couple is always looking at each other, talking about boundaries and connecting even when they are with others.

“We always look at each other in the moment,” she explained.

And when things get awkward, they can quickly de-escalate.

“You definitely have points where you feel uncomfortable. I remember one time I was pulled into a position where I really didn’t feel comfortable,” Jay said.

Jess opened Our Secret Spot with her ex-fiancé, Lawrence, who is still her business partner

“A position that Jess and I have, and I just couldn’t get my head back,” he said.

This is where Jess’s intuition and intimate knowledge of her partner shone through.

“I looked at him and he was like a deer in the headlights,” she said.

“I felt his face change and I realized he was having a freak-out moment. So I pulled him in. I brought things back, so we were alone.’

Jay says he doesn’t get jealous when Jess is around other people – because he “just wants her to be happy.”

But they have strong boundaries: they only swing together and usually they swing with females.

Jess and Jay explained that swinging means that communication in their relationship is always open and honest – which makes their relationship stronger

“I’m more attracted to women,” Jess said.

“I’m happy with Jay as the man in my life,” she added when Kyle asked if they would ever consider a threesome with a man.

Jess said she doesn’t think she can ever completely rule out swinging, but doesn’t mind having her period.

“It’s been such a beneficial change for me. It’s also such an adaptable lifestyle that even if we choose to take some time off to focus on ourselves or start a family, we can do this and close our relationship until we feel the urge to return. in the lifestyle,” she told FEMAIL .

Jess can’t imagine her life without swinging and says she’s seen so much growth in all of her relationships after finding the lifestyle

“Swinging has definitely improved my relationships with my friends and partner. It has allowed me to be honest with myself about what I want from a partner and how I need to be as a person to be happy.”

Jess runs Our Secret Spot in Annandale, inland Sydney. She says that new people who want to try swinging should sit down with their partner and talk about their limits before trying the lifestyle.

In the segment, Kyle appeared shocked at “how normal” the couple were, but turned down an invitation to their club.