There is a perfect time to shower – and it’s not the time you think

One of my favorite things to do in middle age is lie on the couch and eat chips while I google ways to optimize my life with little effort.

Thanks to data-driven online obsessives, I’ve discovered that there is an optimal time for doing anything. Exercise in the afternoonfor example, may reduce the risks of premature death more than a morning or evening workout. Postpone your morning coffee until two hours after waking improves cognition and energy, according to Andrew Huberman, a controversial neurobiologist and podcaster who has developed a cult following for his health and fitness “protocols.” As for the best time to shower? I’m glad you asked. I’ve done extensive research on this issue – and it’s complicated.

Like the orientation of toilet paper, shower times are surprisingly divisive. One group swears that you need a morning shower to get the best out of your day. The evening team, on the other hand, believes that anyone who doesn’t wash before bed is a grubby heathen whose sheets are stained with dirt. Some people – compromisers – suggest that you can get the best of both worlds by washing twice a day. An equally passionate camp warns that this will dry out your skin and increase your water bill. According to a poll, there is one gender aspect to this gap: men wash more often in the morning than women.

Do scientists have a definitive answer to this question? I am afraid not. The consensus seems to be: do what suits you best. That said, there are some no-no’s. A health and wellness expert further said the Busy website: “There are few benefits to showering in the middle of the day… in terms of hygiene it is practically irrelevant.”

As a freelancer who works from home and often showers in the middle of the day, I take serious offense to this. The afternoon shower is criminally underestimated. It relaxes you after a morning of work and gives you a little energy boost just as the lunch break starts. And it’s an excellent way to procrastinate.