SARAH VINE: For once in her life, Kate needs to stop worrying about duty and looking after everyone else – and just take care of herself
Life can be so cruel sometimes. As if the king having cancer wasn’t cruel enough, now this. The news that the Princess of Wales is also battling this cruel disease is almost too much to bear. I know cancer doesn’t discriminate, but this just seems so terribly unfair.
Hasn’t the royal family suffered enough in recent years? The deaths of Prince Philip and his great matriarch, Queen Elizabeth II; the tragic and bitter departure of the Duke and Duchess of Sussex; the king fell ill so soon after the coronation, just as he was getting going.
It was one hammer blow after another. And yet, it seems that fate is not yet done with the House of Windsor.
The Princess of Wales? That’s the cruelest twist of all.
Not only is she a woman in the prime of her life, she is also the mother of three young children: George, ten, Charlotte, eight, and Louis, five. They will now be her top priority, both in terms of protecting them from the public reaction to her illness, but also in terms of reassuring them that the most important thing is that Mom will be okay.
Kate is not only a woman in the prime of her life, she is also the mother of three young children
Nothing is more frightening for a child than seeing a sick parent. I’ve had friends who have been through similar situations – and the guilt and worry are intense. In particular, it is incredibly difficult to endure exhausting and sometimes debilitating treatment while facing things bravely – and that is what you have to do as a parent.
Life for the children of Wales must continue, in as normal a way as possible. Some degree of isolation is undoubtedly best for all of them now. As she said in her moving video message: ‘It has taken us time to explain everything to George, Charlotte and Louis in a way that suits them, and to reassure them that I will be fine.’
She has never been anything but exemplary in the discharge of her royal duties, and since the death of the late Queen and the departure of the Sussexes, she has taken on more than her fair share.
But the person who needs the most care and attention is of course the princess. Like most women in her situation – a busy wife and mother with a demanding role of her own – I suspect she will find it quite difficult to sit back and get better.
Friends of mine who have come into contact with the big C have had to learn to let go and get used to the change of pace. And that’s not always easy, especially if you’re the kind of woman who, like the princess, sets the highest standards for herself.
She has never been anything but exemplary in the discharge of her royal duties, and since the death of the late Queen and the departure of the Sussexes, she has taken on more than her fair share. She is such a dutiful, trustworthy person that she will undoubtedly worry about letting everyone down.
But she really shouldn’t. If there is one thing that has been reinforced in recent weeks, it is the feeling that she is held in very high esteem by the British public.
In fact, I’d go so far as to say they absolutely adore her. It is very clear that in the twelve years she has been married to William (and the almost twenty years she has been in the public eye) she has earned their respect very much. Unlike others, she never expected or demanded it, she just worked hard and consistently, winning hearts and minds little by little.
That is why she is such an important and valuable asset to the royal family. She falls somewhere between the late Princess Diana and the late Queen herself, a unique combination of the former’s beauty, glamor and warmth – and the latter’s tough sense of duty and strength of character.
Her illness is not only a blow to the royal family as a family, but also to the institution itself, which has rarely seemed more vulnerable.
Her focus now must be on getting better and giving herself the space and time she needs to fully recover. I’m sure an entire nation wishes her well.