EXCLUSIVE: Woman who ‘broke up’ with her best friend of 11 YEARS says split was more painful than the end of a romantic relationship – and even left her in THERAPY

One woman says that “breaking up” with her best friend of 11 years was much harder than any romantic breakup, and that the process even landed her in therapy.

Sabrina Kirberg, 31, dated her now ex-best friend for more than a decade until the friend pursued Sabrina after an argument.

The New York-based mental health counselor said she went through the “five stages of grief” and emphasized that it wasn’t as simple as “eating ice cream and having time with your girls,” like romantic breakups.

She eventually sought therapy to help her “grieve” the friendship and still thought about her friend every day.

‘Breaking up with a friend is like sadness. You go through denial. It’s so much worse than breaking up relationships,” Sabrina said.

‘You think you’re doing fine and just need to get through the rough patch, but then the depression comes and you find yourself crying all the time.

“When it comes to a romantic relationship, you’re sad, you eat ice cream, and you go out with your girls.”

“But losing my best friend was like having my support system taken away from me all at once.”

Sabrina met her ex-best friend at an athletic club when they were 16, she said.

They shared a number of ‘firsts’ together over the years, from coinciding first boyfriends, to passing their driving test at the same time and being allowed to hang out without parental supervision.

But as they got older, they started bickering a lot more, Sabrina claimed — and she felt left out when her friend started spending time with other people.

After Sabrina met her partner, Nathanial Baker, 29, she said the two grew even further apart.

Sabrina and her ex-girlfriend met when they were 16 years old and remained close for 11 years

In retrospect, Sabrina can see how they had grown apart, with the ex-boyfriend spending time with other people and Sabrina getting a serious boyfriend.

The pair had one final argument in which they argued about Nathanial.

Sabrina claimed that the friend then “decided to ghost me, instead of talking to me about it,” in the aftermath of the fight.

“I’ve tried so many times to get her to talk to me to explain what’s going on between us, but she’s never bothered to do so,” she said.

“I think that hurts more than the ghosting or anything. It wasn’t enough for her to reach out and talk to me about it.”

Sabrina reflected on the rift: “There’s a lot that caused the breakup — a lot of mean words and anger thrown around.”

“I wish I could have read her mind,” she admitted. “It would have helped a lot.”

Five years later, she’s still coming to terms with the breakup of her friendship, and she’s gone through the five stages of grief to come to terms with it.

“She broke my heart and absolutely destroyed it,” Sabrina said.

‘I’ve never seen her in my life. I imagined her being my maid of honor when I got married, I imagined her being my children’s godmother. I imagined growing old with her.”

Initially, she denied that the breakup actually happened, believing that the couple would make amends as they had done before.

But as time passed without any word from the friend, she became both angry and depressed, recalling that she was “crying all the time.”

What ultimately drove the friends apart was an argument. Sabrina said she “reached out to her so many times to get her to talk to me,” but that didn’t work

“All you’re doing is thinking,” she admitted.

‘You go through the memories again.

‘I spent a lot of time figuring out the catalyst for our breakup – everything I could have done better.

‘I just got angry and ashamed because I saw the warning signs in the relationship and ignored them – and why didn’t I end the friendship sooner?

‘You have to negotiate a lot when you relive the memories, which is like the third stage of grief. I kept thinking, ‘If I had done things this way, it would have happened differently this way’ – and it spiraled out of control.”

Sabrina still thinks about the friend every day, but she has processed her feelings in therapy.

“Years later, I still think about her every day,” she said.

“But I think acceptance happens.

‘Therapy was the way I dealt with it: I learned to love myself so much that I don’t feel like I need anyone else to feel complete.

“I just let myself feel everything: anger, rage and sadness. I realized: the more you push it away, the longer it stays.”