KENNEDY: Hey, Dove. Your cynical boardroom witches hired a BLM bully to promote ‘fat liberation’ and ‘freedom’. But what about the woman whose life she destroyed? You can take your soap… and shove it!

Morning in America breaks out with another brand boycott.

Wake up to smell the pomegranate and verbena scented indignation.

Dove has joined the complacent rush of the Anheuser-Buschs of the world adopting troubled souls from the island of Misfit Pitch People.

The scrappy soap maker has idiotically partnered with a professional Black Lives Matter activist named Zyahna Bryant to campaign for “fat liberation.”

That’s as strange as a multi-millionaire socialist senator from Vermont, you might say.

Dove is owned by one of the largest corporations in the world, whose lifeblood is cutthroat capitalism, and BLM are quasi-socialists who want to spark a Marxist revolution.

But don’t try to give it meaning. It’s a marriage that’s headed straight to divorce court.

And this time, as those light beer-drinking cream puffs learned the hard way, the smug virtue signaling has gone too far, as irate hygiene freaks from coast to coast tell Dove to grab their fancy bar of soap… and move it up . their dirty parts.

Bryant is an ultra-left provocateur of plus-plus size, who makes Michael Moore look like Dylan Mulvaney.

This unholy PR union is meant to celebrate “size freedom,” whatever that means.

“Did you know that body size discrimination affects 34 million people in the United States?” Bryant chatted on Instagram.

Not really. I wasn’t aware of that completely ridiculous made up statistic.

Did you know that 60 million women live with some form of heart disease? And that one billion people think you’re an idiot?

“Size freedom” or “fat liberation” or any other ridiculous portmanteau of words is nonsense, as is Dove’s other campaign, #FreeThePits.

Leave our pits alone. They lie happily under our arms, and no one worried about them until you had to barge in with your perverted PR

On the one hand, the Bryant partnership is a brilliant piece of misanthropic marketing genius.

Dove comes across as brave in glorifying an everyday woman who would be overlooked in a culture that – we are told by the corporate DEI witches – is obsessed with skinny, white girls. (Sure, just tell Lizzo that.)

And if you’re selling lotion-like fragrance products, it’s a bad scientist who’s smart to corner the market for big fat people. By definition, they have more skin to apply and require even more product.

Bravo, you cynical snakes!

But before you start slathering that baby soft cream into your holes like a zombie sucker, here’s the thing: Ms. Bryant is much more than a fearless diabetes advocate.

She also once attempted to maliciously cancel and excommunicate a fellow University of Virginia student who committed the unforgivable sin of running into a white BLM rally in 2020.

Bryant is best known for her role as the leader of a social media mob to destroy the innocent life of a then-rising UVA senior, Morgan Bettinger.

By all reasonable accounts and excellent reporting, Bettinger drove her car to an intersection in Charlottesville, Virginia, where she was stopped by a dump truck. She got out and looked around and saw that demonstrators had sat down in the middle of the road.

Bettinger did say to the dump truck driver something along the lines of, “It’s a good thing you’re here, otherwise these people would have been speed bumps.”

Whoopsie! Somehow that innocent comment was overheard by someone in the crowd and the pitchforks flew out.

Bettinger ran back to her car, but protesters allegedly stopped her from escaping.

The video shows Bryant – who was there – shouting, “It’s a Karen, it’s a Karen,” as she filmed the incident.

‘What did she say?’ one can reportedly hear someone asking.

“She said we would make good speed bumps,” replies another.

‘Oh! We will make good speed bumps,” said Bryant. “Shall we make good speed bumps?”

She grabbed the ball and ran with it. “The woman in this truck approached protesters in #Charlottesville and told us we would ‘get through good speed bumps,’” Bryant wrote on Twitter.

No. That wasn’t true. But socialist sharks don’t care if there’s blood in the water.

Bryant posted videos of Bettinger and her license plate, allowing anonymous social media users to identify her and take a screenshot of her Facebook page, which showed a Blue Lives Matter frame honoring her late police officer. Before the self-agitation, that was essentially a swastika.

“Email these UVA deans now to demand that Morgan face consequences for her actions and that UVA stops graduating racists,” Bryant posted, fueling the storm of anger.

A student-run star chamber convened by UVA found Bettinger guilty of “threatening the health or safety” of students, humiliating her, turning her life upside down and ruining her chances of attending law school .

Only later did it become clear that Bryant distorted the facts to make Bettinger look like a violent monster.

Another UVA investigation effectively overturned that verdict, concluding that no eyewitnesses could corroborate the story, and Bryant admitted that she may have misunderstood the alleged threats.

But there’s no body wash strong enough to remove the stains on Bettinger’s reputation.

So it’s really appalling that Bryant is taking the lady stones to Instagram to announce her Dove ambassadorship and say, “let’s talk about freedom…”

Yes, let’s. Freedom is the very thing you tried to take away from Morgan Bettinger because you saw an opportunity to stir up a boiling cauldron of tasty victimhood to fuel your self-interest.

You’re a bully, Bryant. But Dove doesn’t seem to care, as long as they can tick a box that they can brag about at the boardroom table.

Perhaps we should replace ‘size freedom’ with actual freedom and stop unnecessarily classifying people based on weight, skin color, sex and gender.

Honestly, I don’t care if someone weighs 170 pounds or 1,700 pounds. But it really infuriates me when the fighters of fake justice force their disgusting, self-destructive, self-righteousness on the rest of us.

My problem is Dove’s corporate sponsorship of an anti-woman campaign that encourages an unhealthy lifestyle and promotes a person who has tried to destroy another human being.

Talk about stink pits!

You stink.