I met my dream man last week, writes JANA HOCKING, before he uttered a sentence that was such a “red flag” even my male friends told me to RUN

Is this a red flag or am I being ridiculous?

Last week I got cheated on a date. With a wink. Aspirated. Taken down a rabbit hole. Well… I’m at least 99.9 percent sure I did.

Have you ever been on one of those dates where you thought ‘I’ve finally found my match’?

He’s chatting and you’re mentally undressing him with your eyes, deleting all dating apps from your phone and daydreaming about where you’re going for your first romantic weekend getaway. Well, that happened to me.

I showed up early to the date and ordered myself a glass of rosé to calm pre-date nerves (yes, I’m 38 and still get pre-date jitters). He arrived not long after and praise be to him! He actually looked like the photos on his dating app. In fact, I’d say he looked better. Because lord knows you guys definitely don’t know your good angles when taking a selfie.

He sat down and said, ‘Oh, I should probably get a beer because it’s only Tuesday. I might be tempted to share an entire bottle with you, but that would be dangerous on a school night.”

Jump ahead 15 minutes later and we’re having a laugh and ordering a bottle of wine.

He had quite a few features that I like, baby blue eyes, a cheeky grin, ADHD, which is a weird turn on for me (great sporadic energy) and he was loud, funny and got my sense of humor. We had a brilliant first date. When I ducked back to go to the bathroom, I quickly called my boyfriend to say I was putting up the old dating boots because I had finally found the perfect person for me.

I went back to my seat and he suggested we go to another bar. I thought this was a really good idea.

Oh sorry.

How do you get banned on WhatsApp?

If your account has been banned, you will see the following message when you open WhatsApp: “This account is not allowed to use WhatsApp.”

They block accounts if they think the account activity is violating the WhatsApp Terms of Servicefor example, when it comes to spam, scams or if it compromises the security of WhatsApp users.

Activities that can get you banned include using an unofficial version of the app, sending illegal or threatening content, using it for hacking, getting reported frequently, spamming people, or automating your messages .

To avoid having your account banned, please adhere to the following:

Get permission from your contacts before adding them to a group.

Only communicate with users you know and those who want to receive messages from you.

Do not send unsolicited promotional or repetitive messages.

Follow the Terms of Service.

Only download WhatsApp from trusted sources such as the Google Play Store or the Apple App Store.

It was at the second bar that he revealed something that immediately gave me the creeps.

With no prior questions, and completely out of the blue, he tells me that he has been banned from Whatsapp. How on earth do you get BANNED from WhatsApp?

I asked just that, and he said he had no idea, but I’m calling BS. Perplexed, I even tried different ways of asking him the same question to see if he’d spill the beans. He ended up saying he was in some suss chat groups with guys sharing some screwed up videos but nothing illegal and he didn’t think that was the reason.

I asked him to define “suss chat groups.” He wouldn’t go into details, but said it was just “boys are boys.”

Now I know ‘boys are boys’. I have two brothers and I spent years working in a male-dominated industry with former footy platers, dirty cameramen, sports producers, you get the idea. When it comes to “boys being boys,” I’m very confident that I have a handle on the kinds of things they do.

I have no doubt that there are Whatsapp groups full of illegal OnlyFans videos, horrific sports injuries and dirty jokes. But getting banned from WhatsApp sounds pretty dodgy.

In fact, he said he contacted WhatsApp a few times to try and get the ban overturned, but had no luck.

WTF?? So after repeated attempts, they still choose to ban him from the platform. Hmm…

Maybe I’ve seen too many documentaries about this sort of thing, but my gut is never wrong and it tells me he definitely knows why he got banned – and if he doesn’t tell me I have no choice but to think the worst. Right?

I then asked if he was ever arrested? He said no. I asked if he is on socials. He said no. I asked if he is close with his family (who live abroad). He said no.

I’m starting to wonder who the hell I was on a date with. He has no online presence, is banned from WhatsApp and has no close relationship with his family living abroad (definitely not a deal breaker… but why no contact?). My dramatic brain began to wonder what on earth he has been doing.

Maybe I’ve seen too many documentaries about this sort of thing, but my gut is never wrong and it tells me he definitely knows why he got banned – and if he doesn’t tell me I have no choice but to think the worst. Right?

But then again, I’ve been single for a while now and maybe I’m just finding red flags where there aren’t any. I popped the question to some friends to see if I was being ridiculous for choosing not to see him again.

A friend said it’s not a total red flag and I might have to give him another date to see if I can get to the bottom of it. Maybe he really got banned for something silly and I’m thinking about it. She also said it would be a blessing to date a man without social media (true!).

However, my male friends all said it was a big red flag. One even joked that he had seen some criminal stuff on WhatsApp, but none crazy enough to get a ban from the app.

So, I decided to turn down a second date and metaphorically swiped left. Sure, he could very well be the man of my dreams and I’m ridiculous, but sometimes you just have to follow your gut.

Sigh, back to the dating apps I go.