I’m a therapist – here’s what you should ask before falling in love
A therapist has revealed the five questions you should ask yourself at the beginning of a relationship to know if you are ready for true love.
Jeff Guntherfrom Portland, Oregon, has become a viral sensation on TikTok for often sharing his expertise in the love and romance departments.
He recently shared a video with his 2.5 million followers explaining what to think about before starting a romance.
According to the love specialist, you need to decipher whether you’re being your “authentic self” with your crush and make sure there isn’t a “red flag” that you’re overlooking.
Jeff Guenther, from Portland, Oregon, has revealed the five questions you should ask yourself at the beginning of a relationship to know if you’re ready for true love
He has become a viral sensation on TikTok as he often shares his expertise in the love and romance departments
Most recently, he shared a video with his 2.5 million followers in which he outlines what to consider before entering into a romantic relationship, starting with, “Am I my authentic self?”
Captioning the clip, “Five questions to ask yourself at the beginning of a relationship,” the love expert described the things you shouldn’t forget when you’re in love.
He explained that you should first think about how you feel around the person.
“Number one, am I my authentic self?” he said.
The therapist explained that if you can’t be yourself around your crush, it could be because you know in your heart that they’re not the one, or because you’re too scared to open up.
He said, “If not, is it because my partner doesn’t make me feel safe enough to be myself, or am I holding myself back because of insecurity or fears?”
Next, you need to make sure you’ve thought about any red flags you may have ignored.
“Is there a flaming red flag I’m not taking seriously?”
“If so, is it because there are huge green flags in other areas, or am I feeling a little desperate and lonely?” he said.
Jeff explained that people with lust often ignore warning signs of trouble because they’re so focused on the thought of being in a relationship.
The third question the love expert revealed you should be asking was “Am I holding myself back from really connecting with them?” Can I allow myself to get closer or does more trust need to be built, and if so, how can we reinforce that?’
Next, you need to make sure you’ve thought about any red flags you may have ignored
You need to make sure you can be vulnerable with them and be honest about your expectations
Finally, the therapist noted that while a strong bond is important, it is critical that both you and your partner are willing to grow as individuals as well.
Jeff explained that people with lust often ignore warning signs of trouble because they’re so focused on the thought of being in a relationship.
The third question the love expert revealed you should be asking was “Am I holding myself back from really connecting with them?” Can I allow myself to get closer or does more trust need to be built, and if so, how can we reinforce that?’
While being vulnerable with someone can be a daunting task, Jeff noted that it’s okay to let your guard down and can lead to deeper love.
“Number four, am I being honest with myself about what my expectations are for the relationship, and do they match my partner’s expectations?” he revealed.
Finally, the therapist noted that while a strong bond is important, it is critical that both you and your partner are willing to grow as individuals as well.
He explained, “Number five, are I and my partner open to growing and evolving as individuals within the context of this relationship?
“If not, what should we do to change that mindset?”